Woman be­ing used by room­mate

The Guardian (Charlottetown) - - COFEE BREAK - Q

- I'm early 30's, liv­ing with a room­mate for a cou­ple of years. It helped me af­ford go­ing to school in the past.

Now I’m a work­ing ca­reer woman while she's still in school, and doesn’t work in the sum­mer.

I knew when I moved in with her that she had a cat.

She soon bought a sec­ond cat. I’m not a cat per­son but I'm tol­er­ant of them.

How­ever, she's lately been gone fre­quently for sev­eral days’ trips at a time.

I don't mind tak­ing care of her cats for a night or two, but she just ex­pects me to be the cat-sit­ter while she's away.

I'm gone for Mon­day-Fri­day.

I like go­ing to the gym, vis­it­ing friends, stay­ing overnight at my boyfriend's house.

Re­cently, she said she's go­ing away for a week to the East coast.



When I said that I may not be around and she should get a plan B per­son while I'm at work/with my boyfriend/camp­ing/etc, she got de­fen­sive.

She said she only has a cou­ple of friends in town, both way too busy to check in on her cats.

We live down­town where it's not dif­fi­cult for some­one to stop by for 30 min­utes to feed them and clean the lit­ter box.

I don't think it's fair for her to use me as a live-in cat-sit­ter.

I don't have pets be­cause I don't want the re­spon­si­bil­ity. Am used?

Or is tak­ing care of my room­mate's cats five to seven nights a month just part of the re­spon­si­bil­i­ties of be­ing a room­mate?

How do I tell her that I don't want to scoop her kit­ties' lit­ter boxes any­more?!

In­creas­ingly An­noyed







bit A-You’re be­ing used. Speak up. Oc­ca­sional two-to-three day stints are part of shar­ing a home… but you still need to be asked.

If you were also plan­ning to be away that week­end, she gets another friend or hires a cat-sit­ter (she can ap­par­ently af­ford the trips, so the cat is part of that ex­pense).

A room­mate who uses you, risks los­ing you.

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