Kangaroo Kitty: When a cat carrier just won’t do
There’s an ad floating around Facebook that is kind of my mother’s nightmare.
It’s for a super comfy-looking oversized hoodie sweatshirt with an enormous front kangaroo pouch, created specifically for carrying around your cat. Or small dog, I suppose.
But this item really seems more like a cat person thing, even though people who dress their mini pooches in baby clothes and push them around in strollers are, essentially, cat people.
I thought it was a joke, to be honest — this cat-carrying, Snugglieesque sweatshirt. You know, to mock people who might be inclined to wear such a thing. Because I don’t care how much you love your pet (and I do love my pets), this hoodie is a whole other level of sumthin.
It’s like the feline equivalent of baby-wearing, except wearing a baby is normal, I guess, but wearing a cat is, um … well, like I said, it’s my mother’s nightmare.
Maybe not her worst nightmare, but it’s up there.
I know this because of the tinge of alarm in her voice when I told her I’d taken in another cat, a kitten in distress that was apparently dumped near my home (because people are awesome) and was — to put it mildly — freaking out.
For a week she followed several of my neighbours and me to our respective homes, meowing loudly and walking on our heels as we headed to our front doors. So desperate was she to get inside, she shoved aside fear of humans, of dogs, of other cats. The neighbours and I were keenly aware of the newcomer in our midst. Clearly an indoor cat who was not used to being outdoors, she sat on our patios wailing, begging for food and comfort. I finally relented, took her in. (And yes, I made a real attempt to find the owners, obviously to no avail.)
For those of you keeping score, this means I now have two cats and a dog. For a person who has cat allergy-induced asthma, that’s a whole lotta cat in my home. But hey, I just go for weekly allergy shots, take daily antihistamines, use a steroid puffer and bronchodilator every day. No biggie. The important thing is that the fine, upstanding citizen who dumped a helpless kitten on our collective doorstep sleeps well at night. Ok, buddy? Good for you.
Anyhoo, I suppose my mother’s concern could have been for my physical health. But I can’t help but think the alarm in her voice also revealed a fear that her eldest daughter, the unmarried daughter in her 40s who now lives with two cats and a dog, would become a person who buys an oversized hooded sweatshirt to carry around her cats.
Because this cat-wearing hoodie, it’s not a joke. It’s a real thing you can buy on Amazon. You can even get one with little kitty ears on the hood, so it look like you’re the momma cat, toting around your baby cat, kangaroo-stylz. I’m just saying, it’s possible my mother is also concerned for my mental health, fearing that I’m one stray cat away from buying one of these things. I mean, it would be easier to herd cats if you could keep one or two of them in your front pocket, right?
It’s one thing if you’re a 20something, dressed head to toe in candy-coloured vintage clothing you unearthed at a hipster marketplace. And you profess your love for cats because you’re basically the demographic that started the cat video craze, openly loving a creature that claws your face off when it’s hungry or wants to play. Because it’s ironic. Or because you’re being honest, but let’s face it, you’re kind of being ironic anyway. Either way, it’s OK for you to wear this hoodie.
It’s like a glamazon Mac student wearing pyjama pants to Fortinos vs. me wearing pyjama pants to Fortinos. You see what I’m saying? Completely different. So maybe I should stop wearing pyjama pants to Fortinos, too.
That’s a lot to think about for this week, so I’ll leave it here. And if you do buy this sweatshirt, I want to see photos of you toting your cats, please.
This cat-carrying Snugglie-esque sweatshirt might just be the perfect pet carrier.