The Hipster taxonomy
Lies, half-truths, the joke’s over.
Resin. What is it? A protective coating for a piece of wood? Some kind of tree sap? An ingredient in candlemaking? Whatever it is, it is natural and it is authentic; so too is the resin hipster. Commonly found pouring over Hemingway and sipping six dollar lattes served by a barista with an attitude. Commonly found getting a spruce tree tattoo because they just feel connected to nature and really love Atlantic Canada. Commonly found brewing their own chamomile honey rosewater beer and hanging up framed posters of heritage equipment. These individuals have carefully curated instagrams showcases only their most authentic selves. “A picture of me in front of a sunset holding my 35mm nikon”; “Me and my friends enjoying a quirky picnic in a cornfield”; “An angry barista made me this beautiful latte.” It is important to note that these are not the captions that the resin hipster would choose - their instagram would obviously be peppered with Bon Iver lyrics.
The minimalist hipster can be spotted walking through the mile end wearing cuffed black jeans, a comme des garcons t- shirt, and a plain baseball hat with a curved bill. How much did this immaculate uniform cost? Only the minimalist hipster knows. These hipsters love sparse rooms and satisfying containers. They are the most likely to go clubbing and develop a cocaine habit, partly because clean white lines are congruent with their esthetic, and partly because their affluence allows them to flirt with an edgy dangerous life without having to deal with the consequences. Their instagrams seem so lacking in curatorial decision that the absence actually becomes the esthetic. An unfiltered poorly lit photo of an equally minimalist friend looking apathetic? The minimalist hipster will post it because they just. don’t. care.
The co- op hipster abounds in Montreal. These individuals often wear only other people’s discarded clothing but somehow still look spontaneously hip. These hipsters care. A lot. But not about their instagram esthetic, they care about issues. They are most likely to be chastised for being an angry vegan, or for making a friend feel guilty for not recycling. They love markets and food co- ops and free community workshops because they are so collective. These hipsters’ free-spirited excitement, while often admirable, can sometimes tip into the realm of manic-pixie- dreamgirl. They’re here selling homemade kombucha at the market collective today, but where will they be tomorrow? Sleeping in a friend’s backyard treehouse? Performing at a music festival? Halfway across the country in a rideshare with three people who are opposed to showering? Who knows?