The Telegram (St. John's)

Back to the Future

Our future will soon be in our past

- Ed Smith

That’s the speed with which change, driven by run-away technology, is being forcev upon us. At this point in time, the present, it feels like being hit broadside by a locomotive already off the tracks.

I consider myself fairly aware of the sledgehamm­er effect future technology will have on our society. But I’m also aware I have only a small inkling of what’s coming. It’s like being in a marathon where some of the runners are passing the rest of us like we are stopped. Worse than that, I get the strong feeling we are running backwards. We are losing ground all the time.

It’s like the two senior ladies who got aboard a modern jetliner for the first time. They met the pilot on his way to the cockpit. One of the old ladies grabbed him by the arm.

“Now you look here, my son,” she said firmly. “Don’t you start going faster than sound. My friend here and I want to talk.”

If I am very conscious of being far behind, what in the world will the next five years do to people who are almost totally unaware of the changes coming, and very soon?

One of the highlights of an article I was reading said that in 20 years there will be no more lawyers. Not a good profession to be getting into. The reason is that even now if you need sound legal advice, there is a website you can call where computers will analyse your problem a hundred times faster than any human, and dispense advice.

Likewise hospitals and doctors will be totally unnecessar­y. Right now you can call a website tell them how you’re feeling, describe your symptoms and wait a moment. A moment is all it will take for superfast and super intelligen­t computers to diagnose your problem and prescribe a cure. Nice, eh? Anything more advanced will require more “consultati­on”.

Aother interestin­g feature of the future, we are told, is that in less than a decade, all cars within cities will be electric. Cities will be very quiet places.My oldest daughter spent a half hour yesterday trying to find a parking place in downtown St. John’s. I can pretty well guarantee that that particular part of the city wasn’t exactly quiet during that time. Finally she gave up.

We are told that cars will be nothing more or less than computers on wheels. I don’t know about your chariot, but on mine right now everything that moves is controlled by a computer. Everything from registerin­g the external temperatur­e to moving the driver’s seat back and forth to opening and closing doors. It does not control the opening and closing of passenger mouths. No computer made has that kind of nerve.

This article said that within 10 years every car will be self driving. It will park itself, avoid obstacles itself and for the young at heart the back seat will be a heated waterbed. Forget the heating – the young at heart will supply their own.

I have this strange feeling that much of the future for cars will be in Toronto, Montréal, Winnipeg and Vancouver. Amherst Rock, Fogo, Eddy’s Cove Wesc and St. Patrick’s will be out of luck with the electric car bit. Springdale, too. Oh well. Perhaps we can pick up the heated rear waterbed as an option.

I am waiting for the developmen­t of a vehicle which has a wide display screen on the dash and which suddenly, as you’re driving along, speaks in a loud whisper.

“Moose, two! 20 point bull and three-year cow. 600 yards off highway directly Southwest. Take a shortcut up along transmissi­on line cutover. Animals on small bog. No recent rutting evident. Set sights at 100 yards. No other hunters in vicinity. Keep your voices low. Good luck!”

Or a marvellous variation on that idea:

“Hey buddy. It’s a dark night and there’s a moose right on the edge of the highway 100 yards up the road. Slow down. He’s getting ready to cross.”

Now that’s kind of technology this province could use.

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