A three-year wait for a first date

Reuben and the Dark singer and his wife on their mu­si­cal mar­riage

Thornhill Post - - Currents -

West Coast trans­plants Reuben Bullock (of the band Reuben and the Dark) and Kae­len Ohm have been call­ing T.O. home for a few years now. The pair, who went from best friends to band­mates to part­ners, are look­ing for­ward to Field Trip fes­ti­val where the band will per­form on June 2. Al­though they have al­ways shared a strong pas­sion for mu­sic, Ohm won’t be join­ing them on­stage. She is fo­cus­ing on her film ca­reer as an ac­tor, di­rec­tor, pro­ducer and edi­tor. She’s also been the ge­nius be­hind the lens of some of the band’s mu­sic videos. Here, they give us the scoop on their off­stage love story.

How they met

Reuben: I was play­ing a show at Weeds Cafe in Cal­gary in 2009. Kae­len’s band was open­ing for us, and I was smit­ten. Kae­len: It was my first show with my first band, and I was so ner­vous that I don’t re­mem­ber meet­ing him at all.

The first date

Kae­len: Three and a half years later, af­ter a friend­ship had grown be­tween us, I needed a ride from a Nelly con­cert at the Cal­gary Stam­pede be­cause I ac­ci­den­tally got very in­tox­i­cated. Three things that are pretty out of char­ac­ter for me — rap con­certs, the Stam­pede and get­ting drunk. Reuben: I picked her up on my mo­tor­bike and we had a camp­fire. I think we spent the next week to­gether com­pletely in­sep­a­ra­ble, and she moved in to my basement suite with me a month later.

The courtship

Reuben: I was court­ing her for a long time. We had a break­fast date dur­ing the win­ter one year, and I got in a car ac­ci­dent on the way. I rear-ended a car en route to the diner but still made it in time. Kae­len: I was strangely obliv­i­ous to him court­ing me for al­most three years. The sum­mer of 2013 was mag­i­cal. We drove through B.C. and swam in ev­ery lake we could find, jumped off bridges and ex­plored an­tique stores.

The pro­posal

Reuben: I pro­posed af­ter four months of dat­ing. I had met with a ring maker she liked while on tour in New York. I had meant to pro­pose the next day on a beach I had found a cou­ple of years ear­lier, but I jumped the gun. It felt like the right time and I’m also the worst at keep­ing se­crets. Kae­len: We went to Sayulita, Mex­ico, to­gether. We were walk­ing home one night on the beach and he pro­posed. We cried and took some pho­tos.

The wed­ding

Kae­len: We got mar­ried in Cal­gary at the Hart House, a her­itage home that at one point be­longed to the wrestling fam­ily [Owen and Brett Hart]. Our friend was liv­ing in it at the time, and we were so lucky to spend a week there and cel­e­brate with fam­ily and friends. Reuben: Kae­len was still in the band at that point and we had to play fes­ti­vals on the week­ends be­fore and af­ter the wed­ding, so we took a lit­tle mini-moon in Fernie, B.C. (her hometown), at a place called Island Lake Lodge.

Bal­anc­ing ca­reers and mar­riage

Kae­len: Our lives are in a con­stant flow of change with our jobs. We are re­ally blessed to wake up each day and paint it the way we want to. It took some time to bal­ance work­ing to­gether in the band, and even­tu­ally I stepped out to fo­cus on my act­ing ca­reer. We’re learn­ing that check­ing in with each other is re­ally im­por­tant. Reuben: We’re re­ally learn­ing how to en­joy work­ing to­gether, when we are, and ap­pre­ci­ate the times when we aren’t. Our col­lab­o­ra­tions are feel­ing stronger than ever, and I think it’s be­cause we took a step back and fo­cused on find­ing a bal­ance of in­de­pen­dence and part­ner­ship.

Kae­len Ohm and Reuben Bullock were en­gaged af­ter four months of dat­ing

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