More Understanding, Less Stereotyping

When we discard stereotypes we start to see real people. And it always turns out that on the inside, they’re a lot like us.

“Every coin has two sides” is a popular idiom globally that seems to be well-known in China. It’s a common response to questions, and my girlfriend informed me that everyone learns it in school. It’s a fitting figure of speech for a lot of what is said about China.

Love it or hate it, China pierces the soul and becomes an integral part of a person if he or she stays long enough. Any foreigner who spends much time here tends to develop strong feelings and opinions about the country. During my three- year stay here, China has evolved from a stop on the map and a step on a journey to something more like a second home.

Perhaps this is why I often find myself playing devil’s advocate on many issues related to China. It’s part of my personality: I like to test various sides of an issue and challenge my own assumptions about things. And perhaps I’m a little contrary by nature.

Any country of the size and scale of China is going to be hard to understand in a comprehensive way. The more I learn about China, the more I realize I know so little. The same could be said for the United States. China and the United States are both massive countries of beauty and complexity as well as plenty of contradiction and controversy.

Considering both the physical space that separates our countries and how our cultures have developed along different lines, China and the United States certainly have their share of differences. When reacting to stories in the news or the people we encounter on the streets, Americans and Chinese both tend to generalize and rely on stereotypes for their understanding of the other. And, really, such behavior is only natural when there’s limited knowledge of the other and often little direct contact in daily life.

In the United States, you can find a mix of positive and negative stereotypes about Chinese people. On the positive side, many Americans view the Chinese as super smart and think that they can do calculus in their heads, play the piano or violin, know kung fu, and dominate on ping pong tables. On the negative side, Chinese are often considered loud in public, overbearing parents and terrible drivers.

In China, anyone who doesn’t look Chinese gets lumped together under the laowai or waiguoren (foreigner) label. It’s common to hear statements like: “Foreigners are so polite!” “Foreigners are so rude!” “Foreigners are rich!” “Foreigners are just here because they can’t find work in their home country.” “Foreigners don’t care about their families like Chinese do.” “Parents kick their kids out of the house when they are 18, and the kids don’t take care of their parents when they get older.” “You’ll like this, because foreigners all like this food.” One girl, upon meeting me