CNY News Quiz

HK Magazine - - PAGE 3 -

Kung hei fat choi! The Year of the Mon­key is al­most upon us, so we’ve taken the time to ex­am­ine the last week of the out­go­ing Year of the Goat. Can you pick the truth­ful an­swer from the jum­ble of half-truths and out­right lies?

1) The Demo­cratic Party and CY Le­ung have been scor­ing a po­lit­i­cal points off each other be­cause the CE isn’t go­ing to the party’s an­nual Chi­nese New Year Din­ner. CY says it’s be­cause: a) He never re­ceived an in­vi­ta­tion.

b) He’s just not big on abalone, which is why peo­ple hate him. c) He can’t con­trol his seething hate for the Demo­cratic Party. d) He’s, um, wash­ing his hair that night.

2) The wo­man who was jailed for abus­ing In­done­sian do­mes­tic helper Er­wiana Sulistyan­ingsih has hit back at the helper, in­sist­ing that she was framed for the crime and ex­plain­ing that she had been bul­lied while in prison. She’s likened her spell be­hind bars for tor­tur­ing the do­mes­tic helper to “Hell,” which... a) Proves that karma’s a bitch.

b) Is pretty hi­lar­i­ous.

c) Is ba­si­cally the plot of kooky hit TV drama “Orange is the New Black,” ex­cept for the fact that she was proved in a court of law to have phys­i­cally and men­tally abused an­other hu­man be­ing.

d) Gives Hell a bad name.

3) The gov­ern­ment has skipped a vet­ting pro­ce­dure in LegCo con­cern­ing the con­tro­ver­sial fur­ther fund­ing of the high-speed Guangzhou rail link. This is be­cause... a) The op­po­si­tion has tied up the bill, and the gov­ern­ment badly needs the money by the end of the month.

b) The gov­ern­ment has fi­nally snapped and told Long Hair that it’s fed up with his shit and just isn’t go­ing to put up with it any more.

c) Sec­re­tary for Trans­port An­thony Che­ung has been des­per­ate to go to Guangzhou for years now, and he just can’t wait any longer.

d) What have vets got to do with trans­porta­tion fund­ing? Hon­estly, some peo­ple are re­ally silly.

4) Hong Kong prop­erty sales have plum­meted to their low­est fig­ures in 25 years, and prop­erty agents pre­dict a fur­ther slump af­ter CNY. This is at­trib­uted to... a) A spate of bad news for buy­ers, in­clud­ing in­ter­est rate hikes and the with­drawal of gov­ern­ment land sales.

b) Minis­cule stu­dio apart­ments with poor water pres­sure, hap­haz­ard elec­tric­ity and se­vere mold prob­lems in­ex­pli­ca­bly go­ing out of style among young up­wardly mo­bile 20-some­things.

c) All 7.2 mil­lion Hongkongers re­nounc­ing the con­cept of own­er­ship to set up a Com­mu­nist utopia, the only move left that would gen­uinely ter­rify Beijing.

d) Have you SEEN house prices? Sales are plum­met­ing be­cause no­body can af­ford to BUY. IT’S NOT HARD TO UN­DER­STAND!!!

5) Hongkongers are ad­ver­tis­ing for peo­ple to take home to their par­ents over Chi­nese New Year. They are of­fer­ing $250 per hour to ap­pli­cants who... a) Mas­quer­ade as the per­son’s part­ner over the CNY fes­tiv­i­ties.

b) Are west­ern and there­fore get no lai see. It’s a char­ity thing.

c) En­gage in rep­re­hen­si­ble acts in front of the fam­ily to prove that not be­ing a lawyer or a doc­tor isn’t the worst thing that could hap­pen.

d) Have sex with them when this is all over.

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from China

© PressReader. All rights reserved.