Surefire tips to land in the sack on V-Day
So you’ve landed a hot date for Valentine’s? Here’s how to get horizontal in no time.
Get Sexy Drinks Nice Woods
Quiet, dark and cozy, The Woods has strong, inventive drinks to accelerate the small talk into small undergarments. Go all-out with the prix fixe cocktail and food pairing menu ($588, bookings required), which combines woodland-inspired drinks and food. Can’t wait any longer? The bathrooms are small but dark.
It’ll take some contorting but you can probably do the deed.
L/G, 17-19 Hollywood Rd, Central, 2522-0281.
With lights in the trees, tall drinks and the sweet scent of heady shisha all around, Vibes is a hidden open-air lounge that’s ideal for low-voiced flirting that leads to further nocturnal activities. V-Day sees a Moët Rosé and canapé deal ($488) plus live saxophonist and DJ.
Can’t wait any longer? Vibes’ cabanas (book in advance) are newly equipped with almost-opaque blinds that you can roll down for a little more privacy. Just try to keep it down, OK?
5/F, The Mira, 118 Nathan Rd., Tsim Sha Tsui, 2315-5599.
Fox in the Hole
Win your date over at this swanky new hidden bar. Old-school cocktails go down a treat at Foxglove alongside live jazz every Tuesday and ThursdaySaturday, making this venue perfect for the classier catch.
Can’t wait any longer? Nab the private room for some “us time,” although given that you need to book in advance—and drop $50,000 on a minimum spend—you’ve got to be pretty certain you’re going to score.
2/F, Printing House, 6 Duddell St.,
Clit Fit Get Kinky Toys
Sally Coco stocks everything you need to get kinky behind closed doors, from leather riding crops to wristband cuffs and tweezer nipple clamps (ouch!). There’s also a whole range of sexy lingerie for that naughty vixen look—think thighhigh stockings, polka dot lacies and rhinestone pasties. Dial it up: The Lelo Nea “personal massager” ($849) fits perfectly against the body during sex, or into your palm during foreplay. With this little number, you’ll find the race to the finish line more of a short sprint instead of an unfinished, unsatisfying marathon. Room 302, 3/F, Winning House, 10-16 Cochrane St., Central. Order online at sallystoy.com; free shipping on orders over $300.
One of the largest sex toy shops in Hong Kong, Wanta carries a wide range of imported sex toys, lotions and lubricants, bondage accessories, lingerie and condoms. There’s also a whole section of uniforms and costumes, so you can channel your inner Japanese schoolgirl or sexy waitress.
Dial it up: The “Casino Bunny” set is for those who like to act innocent—but play dirty. The costume comes with a one-piece dress, cuffs and bunny ears, and costs just $283 so you don’t have to be worried about ripping it off in the throes of passion. Bonus: if you don’t rip it, you can wear it again as a Halloween costume. 2/F, 28 Russell St., Causeway Bay, 2449-4128, wanta.net.
If you just want to land your date in the sack, skip the inventive “I’m so kooky and romantic” dates or the long expensive meal and just get wasted in a nice bar. Spice it up in the bedroom with a trip to pick up some entertaining... accessories. Whether you’re after a sultry or sweet look, you can find it at Sheer. Their Valentine’s Day lingerie is all cherry red, with lacy bras and slips to make your man weak at the knees. Dial it up: For something a little more see-through, opt for the Allure silk babydoll slip ($2,480) and matching boudoir bra ($1,410) and briefs ($1,260), in a powder pink satin.
13 Gough St., Central, 2147-3887, sheer.com.hk.
Exotic Erotic It’s Action Time
OK, you’re ready to do the deed. Still living with your parents? Or does your tiny apartment look like a bomb just went off in it? Here’s where to go to knock boots in solitude. Kowloon Tong isn't just full of rich people and Festival Walk. It’s also got some of the city’s swankiest love hotels. Part of a three-hotel chain spread out across the ‘Tong, the bright orange Exotic Hotel is perhaps the best-known and best-furnished— and the closest to the MTR. You can choose from several themed rooms, including one which features a massive fake tree in case you’re in the mood for some Tarzan lovin’.
9 Norfolk Rd., Kowloon Tong, 2338-6223.
$490 for three hours, so make it last.
Shine Bright (in Bed)
Head to the Space Museum’s Astropark in Sai Kung for a furtive fumble under the stars. The site is set up with stargazing equipment for star-lovers of all levels, including camping facilities: So if you’d rather turn your eyes to more earthly pursuits no one’s going to get in the way.
Getting there: From Sai Kung take green minibus 7 or 9 from Sai Kung to Pak Tam Chung, then take a taxi for about 15 minutes: private cars aren’t allowed into the park without a permit. 2721-0226.
Total exhibitionist? Head to Yuen Long’s
Mingle Farm. This camping site has inflatable bubble igloo tents of various degrees of opacity (from $1,300)—including one completely see-through tent if you’re looking to really show off your moves.
30 Fung Ka Wai, Tin Chi Rd., Yuen Long, 2891-8263, minglefarm.com.
Don’t know if love is on the cards? Worried that you’ll never find your one true soulmate? Or has it just been a really, really long time since you got laid? Head to Mrs. Pound’s Psychic Love, where palm, face and card readers Lily and Diana will look into your future to determine if you’re destined for a life of happy togetherness— or lonesome singledom like the rest of us.
Feb 14, 6pm. Mrs. Pound, 6 Pound Lane, Sheung Wan, 3426-3949.