Hong Kong ABCs

HK Magazine - - PAGE 3 -

Mav­er­ick HKTV boss Ricky Wong has said that he’s think­ing of run­ning for Legco later this year on an “ABC” plat­form—that’s “Any­one But CY.” Ad­mit it: With­out know­ing a sin­gle thing about Wong’s cam­paign, you still want to vote for him, don’t you? It just shows the power of a strong “ABC” po­lit­i­cal slo­gan, which is why we’ve got some other Hong Kong ABCs for you.

Al­ways Be Clos­ing

No, it’s not a sales catch­phrase: These are in fact the in­struc­tions de­liv­ered to all pro­pri­etors of small busi­nesses who are try­ing to stay afloat in this year’s crappy econ­omy. Stun­ning new restau­rant con­cept? Al­ways Be Clos­ing. Great startup idea? Al­ways Be Clos­ing. Found a mar­ket niche you can cater to? Al­ways Be Clos­ing, dude.

Any­day But Ching­ming

Rad­i­cal lo­cal­ist group with a zeal­ous de­vo­tion to the

Ching Ming fes­ti­val. This group ad­vo­cates vi­o­lent revolt against the sta­tus quo at all times ex­cept for April 4/5 (Ching Ming), be­cause on that day we are grave-sweep­ing and it is very im­por­tant to re­spect one’s elders. Slo­gan: “Smash the cor­rupt sys­tem (on 364 days of the year)!”

Ar­ti­sanal Bros. Cof­fee

Name of a new She­ung Wan hip­ster cof­fee joint we’re think­ing of start­ing. What we’d do is roast each in­di­vid­ual bean with a blow­torch sep­a­rately to en­sure gen­uine care and at­ten­tion goes into ev­ery sin­gle mouth­ful. We’d make mil­lions. Amer­i­can/Aus­tralian Born Chi­nese

Com­mon catch­phrase: “I just felt it was time to come back to Hong Kong and re­ally re­dis­cover my roots.” Habi­tat: SoHo.

Iden­ti­fy­ing char­ac­ter­is­tics: Speaks bro­ken Can­tonese, works in fi­nance and thinks that go­ing for hun­gover dim sum is the same as com­muning with an­ces­tors.

Acapella Band Com­pe­ti­tion

Noth­ing is bet­ter suited to de­cid­ing the fu­ture of Hong Kong than an all-vo­cal sing-off. Will CY Le­ung’s res­o­nant tim­bre be suf­fi­cient to hold to­gether his dishar­mo­nious group? Will the weak treble chirp­ing of the lo­cal­ists be enough to carry the crowd? Or will Bei­jing just turn the bass up to 11 and blow us all away?

An­son #Blessed Chan

For­get Ricky Wong. Is it time for the for­mer Chief Sec­re­tary and “Con­science of Hong Kong” to step up and grab the reins of of­fice? Yeah it is. #An­son2017.

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