The English writer investigates the pros and cons of buying a historic home in
What would your death-row meal be? A delicious, enormous, elaborate cake containing prison cell keys.
What’s the weirdest compliment you’ve ever received? Somebody left a note on my car window saying “Parking fine.” Which was nice, but odd.
What’s your all-time favourite joke? See above.
What’s your signature dance move? My tantalising twerking.