AGONY AYI

麻烦阿姨

The World of Chinese - - FRONT PAGE -

Why do peo­ple have to talk so loud on their phones when they are on the train? It both­ers me! I plan to stand up next time and ask them to keep it to them­selves. What do you rec­om­mend?

Mo­bile Man

Shut up and be a good倾听者( q~ngt~ngzh0, lis­tener)! These pas­sen­gers are nice enough to开诚布公( k`ich9ng b&g4ng, speak frankly and sin­cerely) in front a group of to­tal 陌生人( m7sh8n­gr9n, strangers). The least you can do is sat­isfy your ap­petite for 八卦( b`gu3, gossip); it's what they would want. Throw in some ad­vice, too. For the girl who's com­plain­ing about her cheat­ing boyfriend, tell her just break up with that花心大萝卜( hu`x~n d3lu5bo, flower-hearted radish, play­boy). For the man clos­ing a busi­ness deal, walk up to him and yell, “还钱!( Hu1n­qi1n! Give my money back!)” Don't be afraid of get­ting told off. It was go­ing to hap­pen any­way. Wise Ayi, I would like to know if you have any sug­ges­tions for liv­ing a green life. I live in Beijing and want to cut my car­bon foot­print.

Got ques­tions for our Agony Ayi? Send them to agonyayi@the­world­ofchi­nese.com

Jim Green

If you live in Beijing, you are al­ready very环境友好( hu1nj#ng y6uh2o, en­vi­ron­men­tally friendly). Think about it, you share an apart­ment with sev­eral other peo­ple and you don't own a car. You take the sub­way or bus for your 通勤( t4ngq!n, com­mute), which of­ten go out of their lim­ited ca­pac­ity to stuff inside as many pas­sen­gers as pos­si­ble. The only way you can be greener is to屏住呼吸( b@ngzh& h$x~, hold your breath) al­to­gether, which is not a bad idea con­sid­er­ing the smog. That being said, you can al­ways give up the mod­ern way of liv­ing and move to a vil­lage with­out elec­tric­ity.

My girl­friend is obsessed with on­line shop­ping. She of­ten spends her en­tire month’s salary on clothes, shoes, and makeup. My mum is not happy about it, say­ing she will ruin my life if we ever get mar­ried. What should I do?

Thrifty Tang

Are you kid­ding me? You de­serve to 孤独终老( g$d% zh4ngl2o, grow old and die alone). Look at all the 单身狗( d`nsh8ng6u, sin­gle dogs, sin­gle peo­ple), you are go­ing to be one of them if you ever dare to men­tion it in front of her. Haven't you heard the old say­ing? 女为悦己者容 ( N) w-i yu- j@ zh0 r5ng, ladies try to look good for those who please them.) You should be感激涕零( g2nj~ t#l!ng, shed­ding tears of grat­i­tude). So go be a real man, and make more money for her to spend!

(BUT YOU PROB­A­BLY WON'T LIKE THEM)

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