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A Pro­fes­sor was trav­el­ing by boat. On his way he asked the sailor:

“Do you know Bi­ol­ogy, Ecol­ogy, Zo­ol­ogy, Ge­og­ra­phy, phys­i­ol­ogy?”

The sailor said no to all his ques­tions.

Pro­fes­sor: “What the hell do you know on earth. You will die of il­lit­er­acy.”

Af­ter a while the boat started sink­ing. The Sailor asked the Pro­fes­sor, do you know swimi­nol­ogy & es­capol­ogy from sharkol­ogy? The pro­fes­sor said no. Sailor: “Well, sharkol­ogy & crocodil­ogy will eat your as­sol­ogy, head­ol­ogy & you will dieol­ogy be­cause of your mouthol­ogy.”

To­day it’s brown

A navy cap­tain is alerted by his First Mate that there is a pirate ship com­ing to­wards his po­si­tion. He asks a sailor to get him his red shirt.

The cap­tain was asked, “Why do you need a red shirt?”

The Cap­tain replies, “So that when I bleed, you guys don’t no­tice and aren’t dis­cour­aged.” They fight off the pi­rates even­tu­ally.

The very next day, the Cap­tain is alerted that 50 pirate ships are com­ing to­wards their boat. He yells, “Get me my brown pants!”

Don’t eat your baby

A three-year old walks over to a preg­nant lady while wait­ing with his mother in a doc­tor’s surgery.

“Why is your stom­ach so big?” – he asks.

“I´m hav­ing a baby.” – she replies.

“Is the baby in your stom­ach?” – he asks, with his big eyes. “Yes, it is.” – she says. “Is it a good baby?” – he asks, with a puz­zled look.

“Oh, yes. A re­ally good baby.” – the lady replies.

Shocked and sur­prised, he asks: “Then why did you eat him?”

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