Keep­ing it Tight and Keep­ing it in!

mailife - - Contents - Bula vi­naka June!

2Bags knows that most of the grog talanoa ses­sions in the next few weeks will fo­cus around two things – Deans rugby and the elec­tions. Two Bags also know the weather is chang­ing. Sa liliwa mai yaaar! So grog­ging up un­der that mango tree in Flagstaff with the D.R squad (don’t ask what that means..) will not be a good idea af­ter­all. As our new grog guru Dr Lai al­ways says as we en­ter the win­ter months of June is to .. “Keep it tight and keep it in.” The cold sea­son is of­ten a test of char­ac­ter for 2bags. Not only does it bring out the kani but also tests your pocket for that sosoko mix. I think 2bags have ex­pected the re­al­ity be­hind the real price of Kava but has taken a life long vow to sup­port our lo­cal farm­ers. Any­ways in the prin­ci­pals of that grog guru from the mango tree in Kau­nikuila here is the “Keep it tight and keep it in” rule for the cold sea­son. Al­ways pack the nivea or co­coa but­ter cream, the cold June winds brings out the ev­i­dence, sur­viv­ing the kava ses­sion es­pe­cially with strangers means you do not show your true colours straight out – un­der kava tu ga! Al­ways carry that favourite grog jacket be­cause you never know where your thirst for the wine of the Gods will take you. Go look for that pom pom you three away last Au­gust – now is the time to walk around with it in your back pocket. Change in weather also means change in es­cape meth­ods – need to adopt ga the Keep it tight and keep it in” method… just stand up and say “Au sa lako I vale..” ha­ha­haha!! Break up all the money you have into saqamoli’s, incase they say va­cava viri for the next round – and know­ing 2bags crowd, they are grog leg­ends and you might have to viri 3-4 times be­fore the night is over. So break up all your money into saqamoli’s and ev­ery viri just put in one so at least you con­tribut­ing…. Lol you know ga times are hard! In this cold weather, en­sure the mix is al­ways sosoko – or you will be mak­ing too many trips to the loo, if you know ga you don’t have enough am­mu­ni­tion to buy the sosoko mix – join the big money squad and se­vu­sevu all the sto­ries un­der the sun – now that’s an old 2bags trick, tri­aled and tested many times by the fa­mous Gar­den City Swipers Dur­ing this cold weather – keep your sto­ries to sports, Deans rugby sea­son is up, so who will be the cham­pion this year? 2bags sug­gests you stay away from pol­i­tics this cold sea­son be­cause it will leave you colder. So throw out elec­tions is­sues and stick to Deans rugby, hockey, netball or even the story of the op­po­site sex to keep you warm and groggy and kinky for the long cold nights.

Taki mada !

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