How can I explain to my 4-year-old daughter, who will soon have a little sister, that her parents are capable of sharing their love between both of them?
Caroline Khanafer, clinical psychologist. Explain that when the baby arrives, she won’t know how to do anything on her own and that she’ll need you to feed her and change her, etc. She’ll take up lots of space, but that will be normal. Yet make it clear that the baby won’t take her place and that your love cannot be divided. Instead, it’ll just grow bigger. To illustrate this, draw a heart with her and fill it up with all the names of the people that you love. Then say: “Oh dear, there’s not enough room for all of them! What shall we do? Shall we take your name out? No, look, we can make the heart bigger!” If she doesn’t ask any other questions during your pregnancy, don’t say anything more. Don’t forget that you cannot ask her to love a baby that hasn’t been born yet.