The Crav­ing Guys Have at 9 PM

Ac­cord­ing to doc­tors, men nat­u­rally get grouchy at this hour ( blame bi­ol­ogy) and yearn for a cer­tain type of at­ten­tion to pull them out of their funk. We fill you in.

Cosmopolitan (India) - - MEN & YOU - By Bethany Heit­man

You could call it the witch­ing hour: around 9 o’clock in the evening, many men sud­denly feel testy. It turns out, it’s due to a sneaky ef­fect early evening ac­tiv­i­ties can have on a man’s hor­mones, say ex­perts. Let us ex­plain: on some nights, a guy might meet friends for a beer or two post- work. Maybe he then grabs a cou­ple of slices of pizza and a cola, or he heads home to eat with you, then scarfs down When a guy’s testos­terone dips, it’s sur­pris­ingly not sex he’s af­ter to make him chill and feel bet­ter, ac­cord­ing to Dr Amen. Your moody dude is ac­tu­ally crav­ing pure af­fec­tion, though noth­ing overly fussy or mushy. “Men need quiet to re­lax and re­set,” says Diana Kirschner, Ph. D., a re­la­tion­ship ther­a­pist and author of Seal­ing the Deal. So you’ve got a cou­ple of choices. If you don’t want to deal with his grouch­i­ness, just head to an­other room.

But if you were look­ing for­ward to time with him and are feel­ing gen­er­ous, what works best is lowkey phys­i­cal at­ten­tion that will coax him out of his funk. And it’s cook­ies for dessert.

“What hap­pens is the stuff he’s eaten over the course of time turns to su­gar— al­co­hol, carbs, and ob­vi­ously any dessert— caus­ing his testos­terone, which is al­ready fluc­tu­at­ing, to drop by up to 25 per­cent,” says Daniel Amen, MD, author of Change Your Brain, Change Your Body. “And that hor­monal plum­met sends his mood into a down­ward spi­ral.” Why 9 pm? “It takes some time for the booze and food to be bro­ken down, so if he’s eat­ing and drink­ing around 7, he’ll feel the hit about two hours later,” ex­plains Dr Amen. some­thing that you won’t mind do­ing ( who wants to dote on a dude who’s be­ing a to­tal drag?) A head scratch is the move to help him shake it off, says Ian Kerner, a sex ther­a­pist and author of Pas­sion­ista: The Em­pow­ered Wo­man’s Guide To Plea­sur­ing a Man. “It feels good and is ex­tremely re­lax­ing, thanks to the many, many nerve end­ings in the scalp. Plus, it’s a gen­uinely af­fec­tion­ate touch with­out be­ing overly so­lic­i­tous.”

There are a few ways to give a great scalp mas­sage, and you’ll have to ex­per­i­ment to see which one he likes best. One tac­tic is to plant five fin­gers at his front hair­line and pull back to­wards the nape of his neck. As you reach the bot­tom, start over with your other hand, so there’s con­tin­ual mo­tion on his scalp.

An­other tech­nique that will help to en­er­gise him: use your fin­ger­nails on both hands to make small cir­cles all around the top of his head. Ac­cord­ing to mas­sage ther­a­pists, that move­ment awak­ens the nerve end­ings. Then move near his ears and run your fin­gers down be­hind them, giv­ing his lobes a quick squeeze.

Fi­nally, if your man is the type to get headaches when he’s down, start at his tem­ples. With your poin­ter and mid­dle fin­gers, ap­ply medium pres­sure and zigzag them back un­til you reach his crown. Then mas­sage the spot where his neck meets his head, and re­peat. And once he is feel­ing bet­ter, you’re to­tally al­lowed to ask for a rub­bing of your own.

‘ There’s noth­ing

on TV... life re­ally sucks!’

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