Ask Cosmo Anything
From random little issues to major life dramas, we’ve got your back.
Q. A co- worker’s boyfriend hit on me at a party. Keeping our professional relationship in mind, how should I deal with this situation? Should I say something to her?
A. Career experts are unanimous on this one: it is crucial to keep relationships with officemates as drama- free as possible. So if you are not close to her, pretend that it never happened. However, if you spend significant amount of time together, you might want to give her an idea. Of course, confrontation is a bad idea. Hint that you think he’s wrong for her without saying a word. Meaningfully raise an eyebrow whenever she expresses doubts about him or their relationship.
Q. It is annoying when a waiter ignores you. What is a good way to get his attention without looking bitchy in front of your guests and family?
A. If you’re desperate, excuse yourself to the bathroom. In most restaurants, the waiter’s station is usually nearby, so hang there for a second until you can flag down your server. Then say, “I hate to have to track you down, but you seem to have forgotten us. Can you bring ( insert request here) to our table?” Keep your tone polite but firm and he should step up on his game.
Q. Does hot yoga make me prone to a yeast infection?
A. This is a common problem with women, but you don’t need to worry. We checked it out with New York- based Holly Phillips, a women’s health specialist. Here’s what she had to say: yeast love sweaty conditions, so anything that increases the heat and moisture in your vaginal area ( like doing yoga in a sweltering room) can increase your odds of getting an infection. To stop yeast from breeding out of control, ensure that you change out of your soaking clothes right after class, and wear underwear made from breathable all- cotton fabric.
Q. I’m often not in the mood when my guy wants to get it on, but I usually go along with it because I don’t want to bruise his ego. Then I started wondering— do guys care if you turn them down? Or is there a better way to do it so that they won’t get upset?
A. Guys definitely care about being turned down— especially if it is being done on a regular basis. For one thing, it means they don’t get to have sex, which is always a bummer. To make matters worse, their feelings can get hurt if they equate a physical rejection with an emotional one. But you said you’re “often not in the mood”. There is no way to tell a guy continuously you don’t want to have sex without his getting hurt, mad and anxious. In your situation, you could do two things: one, ask yourself if there is a relationship issue that’s killing your libido. Be honest with yourself. And, two, keep in mind, experts say women often get into sex once foreplay has started, even if they didn’t desire it beforehand. If that hasn’t been happening for you, consider visiting your gyno to see if there’s a physical reason why you’re not getting aroused.
‘ The bigger the cake slice, the more generously I tip.”