Ask Cosmo Any­thing

From ran­dom lit­tle is­sues to ma­jor life dra­mas, we’ve got your back.

Cosmopolitan (India) - - YOU, YOU, YOU -

Q. A co- worker’s boyfriend hit on me at a party. Keep­ing our pro­fes­sional re­la­tion­ship in mind, how should I deal with this sit­u­a­tion? Should I say some­thing to her?

A. Ca­reer ex­perts are unan­i­mous on this one: it is cru­cial to keep re­la­tion­ships with of­fice­mates as drama- free as pos­si­ble. So if you are not close to her, pre­tend that it never hap­pened. How­ever, if you spend sig­nif­i­cant amount of time to­gether, you might want to give her an idea. Of course, con­fronta­tion is a bad idea. Hint that you think he’s wrong for her with­out say­ing a word. Mean­ing­fully raise an eye­brow when­ever she ex­presses doubts about him or their re­la­tion­ship.

Q. It is an­noy­ing when a waiter ig­nores you. What is a good way to get his at­ten­tion with­out look­ing bitchy in front of your guests and fam­ily?

A. If you’re des­per­ate, ex­cuse your­self to the bath­room. In most restau­rants, the waiter’s sta­tion is usu­ally nearby, so hang there for a sec­ond un­til you can flag down your server. Then say, “I hate to have to track you down, but you seem to have for­got­ten us. Can you bring ( in­sert re­quest here) to our ta­ble?” Keep your tone po­lite but firm and he should step up on his game.

Q. Does hot yoga make me prone to a yeast in­fec­tion?

A. This is a com­mon prob­lem with women, but you don’t need to worry. We checked it out with New York- based Holly Phillips, a women’s health spe­cial­ist. Here’s what she had to say: yeast love sweaty con­di­tions, so any­thing that in­creases the heat and mois­ture in your vagi­nal area ( like do­ing yoga in a swel­ter­ing room) can in­crease your odds of get­ting an in­fec­tion. To stop yeast from breed­ing out of con­trol, en­sure that you change out of your soak­ing clothes right af­ter class, and wear un­der­wear made from breath­able all- cotton fab­ric.

Q. I’m of­ten not in the mood when my guy wants to get it on, but I usu­ally go along with it be­cause I don’t want to bruise his ego. Then I started won­der­ing— do guys care if you turn them down? Or is there a bet­ter way to do it so that they won’t get up­set?

A. Guys def­i­nitely care about be­ing turned down— es­pe­cially if it is be­ing done on a reg­u­lar ba­sis. For one thing, it means they don’t get to have sex, which is al­ways a bum­mer. To make mat­ters worse, their feel­ings can get hurt if they equate a phys­i­cal re­jec­tion with an emo­tional one. But you said you’re “of­ten not in the mood”. There is no way to tell a guy con­tin­u­ously you don’t want to have sex with­out his get­ting hurt, mad and anx­ious. In your sit­u­a­tion, you could do two things: one, ask your­self if there is a re­la­tion­ship is­sue that’s killing your li­bido. Be hon­est with your­self. And, two, keep in mind, ex­perts say women of­ten get into sex once fore­play has started, even if they didn’t de­sire it be­fore­hand. If that hasn’t been hap­pen­ing for you, con­sider vis­it­ing your gyno to see if there’s a phys­i­cal rea­son why you’re not get­ting aroused.

‘ The big­ger the cake slice, the more gen­er­ously I tip.”

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