While going through a particular feature in this month’s Cosmo ( When Was The Last Time You Asked For What You Want In Bed?, page 160), I came across an idea so powerful and ridiculously simple, I literally had one of those ‘smack-head-with-palm’ moments. What if I told you that much of what you want in life can be yours, and all that’s standing in the way of that is one really easy action? Yep, read on...
So, how many of us have wished for a raise, help with a project, discount on a dress, flexi-time, or even more hugs from a boyfriend? And what did we do to make these things happen? Most likely, nothing. We crossed our fingers and hoped that our boss would notice how we totally deserve more money, or the boyfriend would guess that we’d like a canoodle right about now. And when those things didn’t happen, we got all crotchety. According to experts, we are to blame for these failures. Why? Because our technique is plain silly. The number-one reason we’re not getting what we want, they say, is because we’re playing guessing games instead of simply asking for what we want!
Now I know what you’re thinking. That ‘asking is awkward’, or you’re ‘really not the kind of girl who goes around demanding stuff’. And I’m here to tell you that your boss may have a great increment budget for the year, and that the store manager may be able to give you a great deal on the dress, and that your boyfriend may be hoping for some ‘hug time’, too, but you will never find out because you’re too scared to ask. Plus, whether the answer is a yes or no, knowing it gives you power and clarity, and the opportunity to figure out Plan B.
Kinda convinced? Great, so put the idea into practice by asking for something small—help with putting together an outfit or a day off next week, then slowly work on the bigger stuff. As long as you’re nice, not obnoxious, about it, I promise you’ll see success...and get that much closer to getting all that you want.
Till next month,
One of my rare starstruck moments, with Jude Law for Vogue Eyewear. Read his interview on page 141.
Nandini Bhalla, Editor