The Right Way to Deal With a Groper

Cosmopolitan (India) - - COSMO REPORT -

I were hav­ing fun, and this pushy guy si­dled up to both me and one of my friends at two dif­fer­ent times and grabbed our butts,” she re­mem­bers. “My friend laughed it off, but it ru­ined my night and I went home early.”

Re­cent news re­ports about grop­ing have spot­lighted young women who went bal­lis­tic on their as­sailant or sought to emas­cu­late the of­fender by post­ing a cell-phone photo of him all over Face­book. The thing is, no mat­ter how kick-ass you might feel, ex­perts say it’s not smart to go that far. If your groper is still nearby and you feel threat­ened, ask for help from those around you.

An­other strat­egy: leave the scene im­me­di­ately, and go in the op­po­site di­rec­tion of the groper. Head some place where you feel safe and can col­lect your­self, says Holly Kearl, au­thor of Stop Street Ha­rass­ment and founder of stop­streetha­rass­, a women’s safety or­gan­i­sa­tion.

Next, report the in­ci­dent to the po­lice— the sooner the bet­ter, since de­tails will be fresh in your mind and your of­fender might still be in the area. And although cops may play down the crime, the more of­ten it is re­ported, the more se­ri­ously po­lice will start tak­ing it. Also, reach out to other au­thor­i­ties where the crime oc­curred—for ex­am­ple, the man­ager or owner of a bar or dance club— and give them the de­tails on what hap­pened, pro­vid­ing the best phys­i­cal de­scrip­tion you can of the groper, so they can keep an eye out for him.

“Not only will th­ese steps in­crease the odds that the groper is caught, they help you re­gain your sense of power,” says Kearl. “Plus, by tak­ing ac­tion, you’re demon­strat­ing that be­ing a vic­tim isn’t some­thing to be ashamed of.”

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