Ask Cosmo Any­thing

From ran­dom lit­tle is­sues to ma­jor life dra­mas, we’ve got your back.

Cosmopolitan (India) - - YOU, YOU, YOU -

Q. A guy asked me out to see a movie. He picked me up, so I of­fered to pay for the movie tick­ets, say­ing it was like re­im­burs­ing him for petrol money. I didn’t think he would let me, but he did. Shouldn’t he have tried to pay?

A: He shouldn’t have tried to pay for the tick­ets—he should have in­sisted on pay­ing for them. But there’s prob­a­bly a rea­son why he did what he did. Men tend to be patho­log­i­cally ea­ger to please on a first date, so when a woman seems in­tent on split­ting the cost, some guys agree to it, not be­cause they’re cheap­skates, but be­cause they think that’s truly what she wants. If you liked the guy oth­er­wise, give him an­other chance.

Q: I’m 20 and can’t help feel­ing in­ad­e­quate when I com­pare my­self to my older sis­ter. She’s 24, a model, and stick-thin, which I could never be be­cause I’m too plain and big. I don’t pity my­self, but how can I shake this sec­ond-best feel­ing?

A: Keep­ing your body slim is not more im­por­tant than keep­ing your heart and mind healthy. Ex­per­i­ment with your clothes and hair, but turn away from the mir­ror and look around: what seems in­ter­est­ing? You have time to pre­pare your­self for a fu­ture of achieve­ment; time to change your mind, to try some­thing new al­to­gether and time to take up danc­ing or singing or ten­nis, just for the hell of it. Get started on your

own path into all the beau­ti­ful times ahead.

Q: My par­ents ar­gued con­stantly through­out my child­hood and, al­though they have since di­vorced, their bick­er­ing has re­ally af­fected me. In col­lege, I strug­gle to talk to any­one and when some­one shows an in­ter­est in me, I freeze and am un­able to hold a con­ver­sa­tion. What can I do to stop feel­ing like this?

A: One hu­man right that’s free for ev­ery­one on earth is the right to feel down and seek help for it. Your mum and dad weren’t happy, and you suf­fered as a re­sult. Clearly, that sit­u­a­tion is still im­pact­ing you as an adult, which is why you need help. You’re en­ti­tled to talk to some­one about your is­sues with con­fi­dence. Col­leges of­fer stu­dent ad­vi­sors who can put you in touch with a spe­cial­ist coun­sel­lor, or your doc­tor can re­fer you. Coun­sel­lors, ad­vi­sors and doc­tors aren’t crit­ics—and they’re not judges ei­ther. To help and to un­der­stand is pre­cisely what they’re there for, and it’s your right to con­sult them. Please do it now. You owe it to the won­der­ful woman you’re go­ing to be some day.

Q: I’m re­ally ex­cited for the new sea­son since au­tumn is my favourite time of year. What’s a fash­ion­able but easy way to in­cor­po­rate a A/W trend into my work wardrobe?

A: We’re root­ing for the re­turn of clas­sic prints. Af­ter sea­sons of over-the-top dig­i­tal­ized pat­terns, fash­ion’s A-list is ready to go back to the basics. Think of plaid, pin­stripes and hound­stooth as the throw­back stars for work. Scan through vin­tage shops for blaz­ers, wide-bot­tom pants or pen­cil skirts. What­ever your pick, keep it as sim­ple as pos­si­ble—clas­sic is a win­ner for win­ter!

Style star Solange Knowles makes a dar­ing com­bi­na­tion work

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