101 Things About Men
How to Have the Talk ‘What Are We?’
One minute you two are loveydovey in the street and acting like a total couple. The next, he’s giving signs that you may not be as exclusive as you thought. You deserve to know if your guy’s going to waste your time. Here’s your three-step plan.
1 Choose the Right Time
Unfortunately, there isn’t a magic formula that determines when you should have the talk. But generally speaking, it’s go time when you get a sense that you two may not be on the same page, and the where-are-we suspense is nagging at you so freaking badly, that it’s all you can think about.
2 Choose the Right Place
Bring it up during an active moment, like when making dinner together—that way, the question isn’t the centre of the universe, which eases the intensity. FYI, fancy dinners out are a terrible idea—the formality adds pressure, and if the talk doesn’t go well, you’ll both want to leave, but still have to deal with the bill.
3 Choose the Right Words The key is to stick with openended phrases that give him a chance to share his thoughts without forcing him into an answer. Say, “I’m dating only you right now, and I want to know if we’re in the same place.” If he says he’s down to commit, sweet. If he gets all “Uh, I don’t know...,” then it’s time to move on.