Sit at the Table
Success Secret #1
A few years ago, I hosted a meeting for US Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner at Facebook. After the usual milling around, I encouraged everyone to take a seat. Our invited guests, mostly men, sat down at the large conference table. Secretary Geithner’s team, all women, took their food last and sat in chairs off to the side of the room. I motioned for the women to come sit at the table, waving them over publicly so they would feel welcomed. They demurred and remained in their seats. After the meeting, I pulled them aside to talk. I pointed out that they should have sat at the table even without an invitation, but when publicly welcomed, they most certainly should have joined. It was
Multiple studies show that women often judge their own performance as worse than it actually is, while men judge their own performance as better than it actually is.
a watershed moment for me. A moment when I witnessed an internal barrier altering women’s behaviour. A moment when I realised that women face a battle from within. We consistently underestimate ourselves.
We hold ouselves back in ways both big and small, by lacking selfconfidence, by not raising our hands and by pulling back when we should be leaning in. We internalise the negative messages we get throughout our lives. We lower our own expectations of what we can achieve. We continue to do the majority of the housework and childcare. We compromise our career goals to make room for
partners and children who may not even exist yet. Compared to our male colleagues, fewer of us aspire to senior positions.
Internal obstacles are rarely discussed and often underplayed. These internal obstacles deserve a lot more attention because they are under our own control.
I know that in order to continue to grow and challenge myself, I have to believe in my own abilities. I still face situations that I fear are beyond my qualifications. And I still sometimes find myself spoken over and discounted while men sitting next to me are not. But now I know how to take a deep breath and keep my hand up. I have learnt to sit at the table.
Finding an animal
print dress that’s work appropriate?