Hey Girl!

Need a guy’s per­spec­tive on dat­ing and mat­ing? We’ve got your back!

Cosmopolitan (India) - - CONTENTS - By Priyam Chaturvedi

Need a guy’s per­spec­tive on dat­ing and mat­ing? Th­ese men are ready bust some myths.

‘ Do you find her hot?’ See, your friend could be the re­sult of a ge­netic ex­per­i­ment in­volv­ing Ka­t­rina Kaif and An­gelina Jolie and we’d still call her ‘Nice’. This is be­cause we don’t want to give you ammo to be stored in your 2TB hard drive to sur­face years later and bite us: “Honey, want din­ner?” “Why don’t you ask Pooja?! 11 years, 3 months and 4 days back you said she was hot. Ask her!” “Fact: a woman’s un­der­stand­ing of men is a touch askew... prob­a­bly be­cause all your refs come from other women. It’s like learn­ing about tigers by in­ter­view­ing a poacher. So I’m here to bust some clichés...

Shopa­holics Syn­ony­mous Let’s set­tle the old shop­ping de­bate: you love it, we don’t. As a man, our ap­pear­ance has never been cru­cial. It’s your fault, re­ally: as long as we’re pre­sentable, you ac­cept us. We just need a de­cent job, some per­son­al­ity and look hy­gienic enough to touch. See, your fault!

Also, shop­ping in­volves spend­ing money on shal­low things like clothes. We’d rather spend it on im­por­tant stuff like booze, gad­gets and a trip to Bangkok.

Cud­dle Me That! Trust me: men re­ally do like cud­dling! And when we don’t, it’s not be­cause we don’t love you. It’s just that we lost the Tem­per­a­ture Wars (TWs). TWs are fought in ev­ery bed­room on Earth. You see, women are al­ways cold at night. And you al­ways win the TWs be­cause your ar­gu­ments are stronger. And, you’re 11 times bet­ter look­ing.

Men feel hot, al­ways. So when we have to spoon with you, it’s like hug­ging a burn­ing log. Also, we fall asleep in nine min­utes. You spend 30 min­utes hug­ging and talk­ing, ru­in­ing our sleep pat­tern. It’s just not some­thing we like to pro­mote, so we got to­gether and per­pet­u­ated the mis­nomer that we hate spooning.”

“We love to cud­dle. We

re­ally do!” Name: Sorabh Pant Day Job: Stand- up comic Twit­ter: @HankyParty

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