I’m now re­cov­er­ing from ma­jor anorexia, and have re­cently started to so­cialise. I’d like to meet new men, but I have no idea how to ap­proach them. How do I be­come more con­fi­dent?

Cosmopolitan (India) - - YOU, YOU, YOU -


To re­cover from anorexia re­quires hon­esty and de­ter­mi­na­tion—you should be proud of your­self. When ap­proach­ing a new guy, it’s a safe bet that, like most of us, one of his favourite topics is him­self, so greet him with gen­uine cu­rios­ity. Ask him his views on ev­ery­thing, from mu­sic to foot­ball to the re­cent Delhi elec­tions. And re­mem­ber to lis­ten to him care­fully. Is he a player or a se­ri­ous con­tender for your in­ter­est? Fo­cus on what you think about him, with­out wor­ry­ing about what he thinks of you—that’s up to him.

Q: I met a guy at a club a few weeks ago and we got on re­ally well. Then I found out he’s only 18—I’m 23! I’ve been sin­gle for two years, and have felt noth­ing like the con­nec­tion I have with him. But I feel wrong. Should I date him? A:

When you were only 12 and he was seven, the age dif­fer­ence would have been in­sur­mount­able. But you’re both grown-ups now, and a few years mat­ter far less than dif­fer­ences in be­lief or tem­per­a­ment. You both have all the time in the world, so let the re­la­tion­ship take its shape nat­u­rally.

Q: I can’t stop think­ing about my hus­band’s sex­ual his­tory. I keep

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