Ask Cosmo Anything
From random little issues to major life dramas, we’ve got your back.
Q.Before I left for university abroad, my boyfriend and I broke it off. Neither of us could take the separation but now we’re happily back together—the only thing is that my parents don’t approve. They think he’s not good enough for me and say I must choose them or him. I don’t want either relationship to end.
A: Could you arrange a meeting, preferably in neutral territory, so they can see what you see in him? If possible, ask an older relative or family friend to intervene on your behalf. Doing your best to build a bridge between your parents and your life choices will ease your heart and conscience. Q: I’ve found out that my boyfriend of three years has lied to me, hiding online messaging accounts from which he regularly Skyped girls for inappropriate conversations. Does his behaviour count as cheating? How do I deal with it?
A: Habitual online sexual contact counts in a divorce court as unreasonable behaviour, which is a legal label that also covers cheating. But the label doesn’t matter; what does are your feelings for him and his for you. Is your relationship strong enough to give it another go? If so, talk to him. Give him the opportunity to apologise and give yourself a chance to forgive. It will take time to re-establish
trust. But if you feel like you can no longer trust him, wave goodbye. Q: I’m 23 and still a virgin—I feel like the only one left. I don’t want to tell anyone I date as I’m scared they’ll run a mile and tell others. Guys show interest but I’m wary of giving them a chance in case the news makes them change their mind. Will I never do it? Or end up doing it drunk, which is my nightmare?
A: Why do you have to tell every new guy that you’re a virgin? Tell him other things about yourself and ask questions so you learn more about him. Any guy who shows interest but wouldn’t like you if he knew you were a virgin is not interested in you at all. He’s just interested in sex. Believe me, you are not the last virgin; plenty of young women see virginity as a gift to be given to a partner worthy of it. Instead of the drunken nightmare you fear, why not wait for your dream to come true? Even if you misjudge the lucky guy when he comes along and a relationship doesn’t result, you’ll know you invested your virginity in hope—and hope is never a bad thing. Q: How unexpected— suspenders are back, and looked so cool on the Givenchy, and Max Mara S/S’14 runway. I want to give them a shot, but totally don’t know how to... A: We agree, the suspender trend is pretty cool! And there are so many ways to wear it—take the nerdy route and attach a pair to trousers, a collared shirt, and geeky glasses (even a bow-tie, maybe?). Or go laidback-chic and let your suspenders hang down at the sides, as seen on the celebs. For a sexier look, try the look with a cute pair of denim shorts or a fitted, flattering T-shirt.
A model in suspenders at the Givenchy