By Parineeti Chopra
Ms Chopra’s tip for a happily-ever-after friendship—discuss everything with your bestie, including these possibly taboo topics!
“It’s alright to feel bad some days, but if you continue to feel depressed, the situation needs to be addressed. Sometimes, you you may not be able to tell your parents everything, but you can tell a friend,” says Parineeti. Worried that your friend is the one feeling low? “The most important thing is listening to the person, showing you care,” agrees Dr Nicole Highet, Deputy CEO and psychologist, Beyondblue.
WHEN YOU’RE JEALOUS
“If your bestie gets a job you’ve been eyeing, or introduces you to her hot, new boyfriend, while you’re still single, the right thing to do is to celebrate her success and talk about your feelings,” says Parineeti. “Say something like, ‘I’m pleased to see you getting ahead, but it makes me think about where I am’,” says Lyn Fletcher, Director of Operations, Relationships Australia.
Talking cash can be tricky, especially in friendships. If your friend is broke, be considerate and pick outings that you know she can afford. If she always expects you to pay the bill, say something like, ‘I just spent a bomb at the dentist’s, can we split the bill?’ And what if she got a raise and you didn’t? “Don’t be negative,” says Parineeti. “Instead, ask her how she did it—it’ll give you tips on what she’s doing right and might help you improve your own situation.”
“If you’re struggling with body confidence, your girlfriends are the ones to discuss this with— they’re honest and your best critics,” says Parineeti. Also discuss this with your gal pals: a new study suggests that women’s perception of their friends’ body image concerns influences how they feel about their own bodies. Which means you’d both be happier if you were less critical of your own bodies.
“It’s always nice to know what your friends think of your man. They can view your relationship—and guide you—from a neutral point of view,” advises Parineeti. “It’s also a good idea to include male friends, as they can offer a new perspective.” That said, there are some things you should not discuss with friends—the dirty deets of your fight, your guy’s cash problems, and his personal probs. Finally, when asking for advice, be prepared for complete honesty—that’s the point of a good friend, no?