I’ve been with my boyfriend for nearly a year. He treats me like a princess, but the prob­lem is I’ve al­ways had anx­i­ety at­tacks that leave me shaken, and feel­ing strange and dif­fer­ent. He helps me through them but I’m scared he’ll get fed up. How do I kno

Cosmopolitan (India) - - YOU, YOU, YOU -


You’ve got this stick by the wrong end. You need to ask not whether he’ll put up with your moods, but what hap­pened in your past that de­mor­alised you so much that it can still in­duce bouts of anx­i­ety; that, in­stead of this re­la­tion­ship boost­ing your self-es­teem, your boyfriend’s af­fec­tion only adds to your anx­i­ety in wor­ry­ing he’ll drop you. The thing that’d be most likely to make that hap­pen is his own feel­ings of in­ad­e­quacy at be­ing un­able to help end your dark moods. Anx­i­ety at­tacks re­spond to ther­apy. You owe it to him—and even more to your­self—to seek pro­fes­sional coun­selling via ad­vice from your GP or a psy­chol­o­gist.

Q: My boyfriend is loving when we’re alone, but when we’re out, he acts like he doesn’t want to be seen with me and leaves me on my own. As a re­sult, some of his friends hit on me. And when I leave I feel he can’t wait to get rid of me. Does he just not like PDA? Or is he see­ing some­one else? A:

It could be ei­ther. Or both. Or it could be some­thing else al­to­gether. How­ever, if there were another woman, don’t you think his so-called friends who hit on you would have told you? As for fear of pub­lic dis­plays, is it not at least as likely that his per­sonal feel­ings will worry him? Does he

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