‘When in love, just stop think­ing what your friends would think’

Hindustan Times (Chandigarh) - City - - LIFESTYLE - CYRUS BROACHA

I want to talk to girls in my col­lege and make them laugh, but I can’t come up with a topic. I’ve just been say­ing ‘hello’ to them. Please help. VK

I’m go­ing to ask you to write down a few top­ics — pho­to­syn­the­sis, ce­ment mix­ers, and the shelf life of cal­cium car­bon­ate. Th­ese are a few top­ics that you don’t dis­cuss. No mat­ter what. Let me also ex­plain to you as kindly as I can, that if you just keep re­peat­ing ‘Hello’ to ran­dom girls, sooner or later, you’ll be ar­rested or put into a men­tal in­sti­tu­tion. Girls re­spond best to ‘nor­mal’ be­hav­iour, not forced stand-up comedy. I should know.

I have a crush on my batch­mate but I can’t ut­ter a sin­gle word in front of her. This is af­fect­ing my stud­ies. Please help. SG

When you say you can’t say a sin­gle word, does it in­clude non­sen­si­cal words, like ba-ba, goo-goo, de­mon­eti­sa­tion? If you can even make small sounds, that’s a start. Just say the word, ‘Hey’. Prac­tise in the loo, in a gar­den, at a zoo, wher­ever you can. Then just en­gage her with the word ‘Hey’. If you get a ‘hey’ back from her, you’ve taken the first step, in a long, but worth­while, process.

I’ve de­vel­oped feel­ings for a friend who is not so at­trac­tive but re­ally nice. I’m afraid that my friends will judge me. I’m get­ting mixed sig­nals from her. What should I do? GB

I don’t un­der­stand the phrase “not so at­trac­tive, but re­ally nice”. Do you find her at­trac­tive? Do you like, re­spect, and want her? Stop think­ing about your friends’ opin­ions. Un­less the friends are go­ing to be part of all your fu­ture re­la­tion­ships. In­stead, try to source out her feel­ings about you. If you spend all your free time to­gether, the an­swer is pretty ob­vi­ous.

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