IM­PROVE YOUR THOUGHT PAT­TERNS

Hindustan Times (Chandigarh) - Guide - - FRONT PAGE -

ers. It has be­come a habit with to­day’s em­ploy­ees to give ad­vice to oth­ers, while not ap­ply­ing the same to their own selves.

Suc­cess re­quires com­pe­tence

Com­pe­ti­tion, jeal­ousy, and greed sim­ply give rise to un­healthy ways of harm­ing oth­ers. Suc­cess does come that eas­ily. It re­quires com­pe­tence that comes with self con­fi­dence and fo­cused at­ten­tion, which op­er­ate as we fully at­tend to the job in hand. Un­less and un­til we re­move our in­hi­bi­tions we are not go­ing to suc­ceed that eas­ily.

No one of us is born in­fe­rior, yet so many of us nur­ture in­fe­ri­or­ity com­plexes. Such com­plexes are cer­tainly not real. Nei­ther are they based on real ex­pe­ri­ences. They ac­tu­ally orig­i­nate out of our own nega- tive think­ing. They orig­i­nate from our own base­less con­clu­sions that we have this or that weak­ness.

Had psy­chol­o­gist Adler de­vel­oped the in­fe­ri­or­ity com­plex that he would al­ways be a fail­ure in math­e­mat­ics, he would have never risen in life. Had Lin­coln got a sink­ing heart cog­i­tat­ing over the wrong taunt of that jeal­ous mother, he would have gone to the winds long ago. And we are still wor­ry­ing that we are in­fe­rior in this or that.

Learn to be­lieve in your own self

To suc­ceed in any line, learn to be­lieve in your own self. It is only when we be­lieve in what oth­ers say or tell that we are losers. How can you ex­pect oth­ers to praise you and con­sider them­selves as weak? Hu­man pride does not al­low that to hap­pen, how­so­ever close the other one may be to you.

It is your own duty to praise your own tal­ents and qual­i­ties. As you praise your­self thus, your la­tent po­ten­tial comes to the fore. That is the best way to ex­tin­guish your weak­nesses and el­e­vate your glar­ing good points.

Many em­ploy­ees fear to han­dle even a mi­nor sit­u­a­tion alone. Such em­ploy­ees al­ways wish to have some­one at their side. This is a sheer phobia. Its roots go back to child­hood ex­pe­ri­ences. As a child you were not al­lowed to do a thing of your own. And that had given birth to a fear in you that it is dif­fi­cult for you to han­dle a sit­u­a­tion of your own.

Take op­por­tu­ni­ties head on, feel elated

But there is noth­ing to fear now. It should rather be taken as an op­por­tu­nity that you are al­lowed to do a thing in­de­pen­dently now. It is just a mat­ter of at­ti­tude that puts a hur­dle in what you do. Now why not change your at­ti­tude? Rather feel elated to han­dle the sit­u­a­tion with your own in­de­pen­dent method­ol­ogy. Just one or two times prac­tice will en­cour­age you how ef­fi­cient and suc­cess­ful you alone can be.

Now shun all worries. When oth­ers judge you neg­a­tively, they are mostly wrong. You are in­fe­rior to none. You have your own pe­cu­liar and pow­er­ful po­ten­tial. Re­alise it. Ex­plore it. Utilise it. And be of pro­duc­tive and con­struc­tive use to oth­ers.

With ef­forts you can add value to your worth, do­ing a good work. And you will your­self see how peo­ple shower much praise upon you. See your­self as wor­thy. Feel your­self wor­thy. And you will be­come wor­thy. When you change your thought pat­terns in a pos­i­tive way, only sky is the limit to what you can achieve. The writer is a Kan­gra based psy­chol­o­gist, a noted ca­reer ex­pert, and a pop­u­lar mo­ti­va­tional speaker hav­ing more than 40 years’ ex­pe­ri­ence. He can be con­tacted at di­rec­tor.ca­reer­world@gmail.com

Prof DC Sharma amous psy­chol­o­gist Dr Al­fred Adler faced a bad be­gin­ning – his pri­mary school­teacher had told him that he was poor in math­e­mat­ics. The teacher in­formed Adler’s par­ents not to ex­pect much from the child. His poor grades also proved this fact. But Adler ac­cepted such ver­sions about him pas­sively. opens. Equally true is this that when one door opens an­other one closes. But of­ten we look re­gret­fully at the closed door, and we do not clearly see the one which is open to us.

That’s how we our­selves, and shape our thought pat­terns, which ul­ti­mately make and shape our work­place sit­u­a­tions and life. Ig­nor­ing to look into the door that opens is like pluck­ing the blos­soms. How can we ex­pect to taste the fruit when we opt to pluck the blos­soms too!

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