‘Help, I am very sen­si­tive’ life­coach

Hindustan Times (Delhi) - HT Education - - Front Page -

TENDRA

G PA L I am among the top five students of my class (sci­ence). I re­act eas­ily. I have cry­ing spells when some­thing makes me feel in­se­cure. How do I build my emo­tional strength?

—A sen­si­tive stu­dent It is ap­pre­cia­ble that you are do­ing well at school. Ex­pe­ri­enc­ing a full range of emo­tions is a nor­mal part of life. Ev­ery­one ex­pe­ri­ences sit­u­a­tions when work is do­ing badly, when a hobby ceases to be ful­fill­ing, or when oth­ers don’t seem to un­der­stand you. If all our self-es­teem, there­fore, is bound up in just one as­pect of our lives, there will be times when we would be­come vul­ner­a­ble.

It is im­por­tant to un­der­stand our weak­ness as well if we want to evolve into bet­ter hu­man be­ings and you have grace­fully done that. Emo­tions are a sort of a cog­wheel around which our lives re­volve. Our feel­ings influence our think­ing and our think­ing im­pacts our be­hav­iour. Hence, it is im­por­tant to man­age our emo­tional re­ac­tions in day-to-day life. It will be pos­si­ble only when we de­velop the abil­ity to per­ceive emo­tions and their trig­gers ac­cu­rately.

We need to think about how we in­ter­pret a sit­u­a­tion, what mean­ings we give to oth­ers’ in­ten­tions, whether there is a ne­ces­sity to think and be­lieve in ab­so­lutes and start de­mean­ing our­selves. All of us feel hurt at times but we should try to chan­nelise our neg­a­tive emo­tions through con­struc­tive ways such as de­vel­op­ing a hobby, talk­ing it out, learn­ing to re­lax and chang­ing the cy­cle of our thoughts – which usu­ally make us feel all the more neg­a­tive. If you still feel in­ca­pable of do­ing so, you could seek pro­fes­sional help.

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