‘Don't hurry to pro­pose’

Hindustan Times (Patna) - Live - - Lifestyle -

I was in a long dis­tance re­la­tion­ship with a guy for more than a year. I had even helped him come out of his for­mer re­la­tion­ship. But then, one day, af­ter see­ing his ex, he sud­denly broke up with me. He has ended all con­tacts with me. I am lonely and de­pressed. I miss him and can’t live with­out him. Please help.

SC See, this is why Timur could not rule over Delhi for long. Poor Timur had three same prob­lems. Long dis­tance re­la­tion­ships. Keep­ing in touch with Delhi from Sa­markand was too te­dious... And mind you, Timur had no email , SMS or even tele­grams at his dis­posal. And the postal ser­vice kept get­ting eaten up by wild an­i­mals in lower Punjab. SC, con­trol of re­la­tion­ship be­comes less and less di­rectly pro­por­tion­ate to how far is the dis­tance. Only Amer­ica and Pak­istan are the slight ex­cep­tion to the rule. You can’t fight a bat­tle with­out be­ing in the bat­tlelfield. Mean­while, let me warn you that if you are trav­el­ling through lower Punjab, well the wild an­i­mals are still there. I have been in love with a girl for a year. But I con­tacted her for the first time only four months back. I have never met her. Af­ter get­ting to know about me, her par­ents don’t let her go out. Her fa­ther has even threat­ened me in­di­rectly. How do I start meet­ing her?


Ji­gyashu ...er may I call you Jiggs? Thank you so much, but you have not pro­vided the most cru­cial piece of of in­for­ma­tion. It's like pre­par­ing a hy­dro­gen bomb but for­get­ting to put in the hy­dro­gen. Is the girl in­ter­ested in you? Does she love you? Is she crazy about you? Does she know who you are? Does she know your name? Does she even know you ex­ist? Can she tell the dif­fer­ence be­tween you and say an as­sort­ment of dried veg­eta­bles? See Jiggs, her par­ents know about you that’s clear. They ob­vi­ously pre­fer dried veg­eta­bles to you. But you are in love with a girl you’ve never phys­i­cally met and barely con­tacted once or twice. That’s the same thing as be­ing in love with a poster. And you can prob­a­bly be as­sured of the same re­sults, so be­fore you move heaven and earth to meet her, please find out — is she se­ri­ously in­ter­ested in you? If she starts phon­ing or mes­sag­ing you a lot, if she takes the ini­ta­tive then one can look at meet­ing her. I like a girl who is too nerdy. My friends said that if I con­vince her that work and love go hand-in-hand, I stand a chance of win­ning her love. I pro­posed to her, and haven’t spo­ken to her since that day. Please give me some tips on talk­ing to her.

7or 7or, you pro­posed to her and then promptly stopped speak­ing to her again. A well thought out plan. I’d ap­plaud you, but you wouldnt be able to hear me. Why are you guys al­ways in a hurry to pro­pose? Thats step 26. You’ve got many steps be­fore that. You have to chat, to make a con­nec­tion. Chat regularly, go on a date, go on many dates. It’s a proper process. You can’t just pro­pose. You are be­hav­ing like a go­rilla. A male go­rilla in mat­ing sea­son (pro­poses and then mounts his mate, with­out ever speak­ing to her again.) In some cases. there is only one tip. Get to know the girl and get her to know you. I am in love with my step cousin. Ini­tially, we started off as friends. He also wants to spend his life with me. My par­ents are against our re­la­tion­ship. Will our so­ci­ety ac­cept us? What should I do?

Con­fused soul Dear Soul, you ask too many ques­tions far too quickly. It's like a ma­chine gun fire. How­ever, hav­ing vis­ited par­lia­ment twice in re­cent years I must tell you I can deal with peo­ple talk­ing at 6’s and 7’s. I con­sulted a med­i­cal ex­pert but his brother dated a fa­mous home­opath once so he’ll just have to do. Step cousin is safer than dat­ing a cousin so you may well es­cape health im­pli­ca­tions. That is, if this re­la­tion­ship was to go fur­ther and then like typ­i­cal In­di­ans re­sult in ba­bies. About so­ci­ety I can tell you it’ll be a mind re­ac­tion. But in to­days world peo­ple for­get real fast.

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