A tip for online daters: Brag less, reveal more about the real you
Bragging is a strict no-no if you wish to attract a possible partner through online dating. Rather, present yourself as humble and “real,” suggests new research.
Braggers are often seen as arrogant or immodest, and highlighting your favourable physical characteristics and personality traits while minimising the negatives in the online profile can reduce the viewer’s intention to contact you. “Daters should strive to present themselves as humble, ‘real’ people,” say the authors, especially if daters want to establish a relationship based on trust.
Crystal Wotipka and Andrew High of the University of Iowa asked 316 online daters what they thought of some profiles. Participants were presented with one of four sample online dating profiles that exhibited different types of content development by the profile owner.
The researchers looked specifically at the effects of two concepts — selective-self presentation and warranting. Selective selfpresentation is people’s ability to highlight the most flattering information to others.
In the context of online dating, where the goal is to attract a partner, one tends to “brag” a little. People can “warrant” their profiles by providing access to corroborating sites — a link to a professional biography page or a blog to which they regularly contribute.
The authors found that viewers judged people who were perceived as overly bragging about themselves, their looks or their accomplishments as less trustworthy and less socially attractive, thereby lessening viewer’s intentions to date or contact those profile owners.
DATERS SHOULD STRIVE TO PRESENT THEMSELVES AS HUMBLE AND ‘REAL’ PEOPLE