Heart to hurt
Experts talk about abusive relationships and give tips on how to find out if you’re in one
Abusive relationships are quite widespread in our society, but no one talks about them. In fact, experts think such relationships are so common that many people don’t even know if they are in one. Therefore, HT got experts to talk about the most salient aspects of abusive relationships.
The physical aspects of abusive relationships are easily apparent, but people need to realise that abuse or torture can be subtle and underhanded as well. Emotional abuse often goes unnoticed by friends and family, and may cause acute depression, panic or anxiety attacks, and even give rise to suicidal tendencies.
Abusers may seem to be overly caring and protective to others, but they are often good manipulators and can convince the victim that they deserve the abuse.
PEOPLE NEED TO REALISE THAT ABUSE OR TORTURE CAN BE SUBTLE AND UNDERHANDED AS WELL. EMOTIONAL ABUSE CAN CAUSE DEPRESSION
Victims of abuse usually exhibit signs, some of which include withdrawing from society, fear of social settings, no opposition to their partners, and fear and panic at the slightest trigger.
An abuser may appear to be controlling and threatening, exhibit sudden mood swings, have a humiliating and demeaning attitude, and even have a tendency towards verbal abuse.
People in abusive relationships are likely to deny that they are in one due to the fear of being hurt further. People who have a history of physical or mental abuse rarely question it.
You become the person your partner wants you to be. When your partner constantly criticises you for being who you are and keeps on trying to change you and blames you for any issue, it should be a warning that you are in a toxic relationship.
A person constantly trying to not show that he or she is unhappy in a relationship because of the partner may also be a sign of an abusive relationship.
An abuser may also try to bring the other person’s morale down by saying or doing things that are not appreciative or help the other partner reach their individual goals in life. – Neeta V Shetty, psychotherapist and life coach — Kavita Mungi, mental health counsellor