TOP 10 Things You Must Not Do When Plan­ning a Sur­ro­gacy Ar­range­ment

IVF India - - Unplugged - By Ravi Sharma

Sur­ro­gacy could be the ideal way to have a child with blood re­la­tions. Sur­ro­gacy can well be the an­swer for those seek­ing an op­tion for rent­ing a womb that can well fit within their bud­gets. As a mat­ter of fact, sur­ro­gacy can be a great gift for in­fer­tile and child­less cou­ple in or­der to ful­fill their de­sire to be­come par­ents. How­ever, there are cer­tain things that you must not do when plan­ning a sur­ro­gacy ar­range­ment.

NEVER AVOID LE­GAL IS­SUES

A sur­ro­gacy ar­range­ment usu­ally needs le­gal in­for­ma­tion as the laws re­lated to as­sisted re­pro­duc­tion might dif­fer from one state to an­other and coun­try to coun­try. It is sig­nif­i­cant that ev­ery party in­volved in such an ar­range­ment in­cludes a clear un­der­stand­ing of all the risks in­volved with such ar­range­ments. You must not avoid seek­ing le­gal ad­vices. If you are in doubt about any­thing re­lated to the process then you con­sider seek­ing in­de­pen­dent le­gal ad­vice.

NEVER DIS­RE­SPECT EMO­TIONAL IS­SUES

Psy­cho­log­i­cal coun­sel­ing is a must. It’s a right step to dis­cuss whether sur­ro­gacy is right for you and if you can ac­tu­ally do sur­ro­gacy. It is a dif­fi­cult de­ci­sion to al­low a child for you. There are women you re­quire a sur­ro­gate mother, how­ever they will try to con­trol each and ev­ery as­pect of the life of a sur­ro­gate and this is what causes the con­flicts be­tween them. You must se­ri­ously con­sider all th­ese fac­tors and dis­cuss the op­tions with your coun­selor.

NEVER TRY TO CON­TROL A SUR­RO­GATE’S LIFE

It’s a com­mon is­sue and most women who re­quire a sur­ro­gate mother of­ten try to con­trol the life of a sur­ro­gate in ev­ery re­spect. This is what causes ma­jor con­flicts be­tween the two. You must con­sider child free liv­ing se­ri­ously and go for a con­sul­ta­tion with your coun­selor.

NEVER AVOID GEN­ERAL GUID­ANCE

If you are con­sid­er­ing in­ter­na­tional sur­ro­gacy then you must know that in­ter­na­tional sur­ro­gacy is some­what a com­plex area. The method and process in­volved for get­ting the child back to your coun­try can be com­pli­cated and long and might take sev­eral months to com­plete the whole pro­ce­dure. If you are con­sid­er­ing sur­ro­gacy in In­dia, you must get to know the doc­u­ments that are set out based on the pro­ce­dures and re­quire­ments.

BE OPEN FOR SUG­GES­TIONS. NEVER COM­PRO­MISE ON SUR­RO­GACY AR­RANGE­MENTS

While there are spe­cific clin­ics and hos­pi­tals that deal with sur­ro­gacy, the of­fice of the high com­mis­sion in the for­eign coun­try can of­fer a gen­eral list of clin­ics and hos­pi­tals in dif­fer­ent re­gions. So, you must be open for sug­ges­tions.

NEVER AVOID PARENTAL RIGHTS

In some cases, the Home of­fice needs a parental or­der to reg­is­ter the child as the cit­i­zen of the coun­try. It is parental or­der which trans­fers the le­gal rights to you as the in­tended par­ents. You must be open to such gen­eral guid­ance and fur­ther in­for­ma­tion. You must re­fer any queries about the parental or­ders to your home of­fice.

NEVER AVOID THE CON­TRACT

It is the con­tract which is con­sid­ered as the very first com­mit­ment that you might make. It is a wordy and long con­tract which you can ex­pect. How­ever, it is sig­nif­i­cant that you read out the de­tails and un­der­stand what you are ac­tu­ally com­mit­ting to.

NEVER AVOID COM­MU­NI­CAT­ING OTH­ERS

Speak up and talk to oth­ers who have al­ready been through sur­ro­gacy and never hes­i­tate to con­tact your lawyer or sur­ro­gacy agent if you have any queries.

NEVER AVOID IN­SUR­ANCE AGREE­MENTS

There are many other agree­ments as well as con­tracts that you will need to sign dur­ing the pro­ce­dure. There can be agree­ments in re­la­tion to in­sur­ance. All of th­ese are es­pe­cially im­por­tant.

SUR­RO­GACY MATCH

Find­ing the sur­ro­gacy match can be the emo­tional and ex­cit­ing time for the in­tended par­ents. Hence, meet­ing the sur­ro­gate for very first time pro­vides an op­por­tu­nity to get to know one an­other and ul­ti­mately agree to work with one an­other. Find­ing out a sur­ro­gate might take any­where be­tween one month to eight months time. The match meet­ing is con­vened to screen the sur­ro­gate for the in­tended par­ents.

The author RAVI SHARMA is a Di­rec­tor of ARTbaby and can be reached at ravi.sharma@artbaby.in OR info@artbaby.in www.artbaby.in

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