Go Ahead Get Pregnant!
MY ADVICE TO WOMEN IN THEIR 40'S WHO WANT TO BECOME MOTHERS IS TO GO AHEAD AND GET PREGNANT FARAH KHAN tells JYOTHI VENKATESH
How active were you during the days of your pregnancy? All through the making of Om Shanti Om, I had a great time. If you remember I was present even during the music launch of the film and Shah Rukh Khan even had fetched a chair for me to sit on the dais. I was very active during my pregnancy. In fact, in the first few months, I was very buy finishing several portions of my film. I remember I used to have morning sickness when I was filming the song Dard E Disco on Shah Rukh. I used to throw up and Shah Rukh had to keep on removing his shirt. Though the doctors had advised me not to go out, I was all over the sets because I had to complete the film.
Wasn't it quite risky considering you were heavily pregnant? Only the last month was tough for me because my stomach had by then become very big. In fact I remember I wanted to kill those people who said I looked nice during my pregnancy because I had bloated heavily.
How does it feel being the mother of triplets? It feels fantastic being the mother of triplets. You would not believe it but sometimes I check at night whether three babies are there. In the first month after my delivery, it was actually going above our heads Ever since I delivered my three babies, I am taking it easy and not taking up any assignment. I am not doing too much. I devote a day in a week to the shooting of Nach Baliye 4. I feel that there is no point in having your babies with great difficulty and then leaving them behind at home with their ayahs.
When did it sink in you that you are the mother of not one but three babies? To tell you the truth, though we knew in advance that I was going to deliver triplets, we were both numb for a week after they were born. It did not sink in at all that they were our babies. It was only after the first two weeks that Shirish and I started bonding with our babies. Now I just cannot imagine life without my babies.
What have you named your three kids? I have two daughters and one son. I have named my son Czar. Czar means an emperor. I have named my two daughters Diva and Anya. Diva is an Italian word for prima Donna, the main singer in the opera. Anya means inexhaustible in Sanskrit and graceful in Russian. Diva and Czar are similar looking but not identical. Its is said that one in two million triples are identical.
How easy going are your babies? My babies are well behaved. They cry only when they are hungry or whenever they want to relieve themselves, not otherwise.
In what way has motherhood changed you as a person? I am no longer the baby that I was any more, with the arrival of my three babies.. Nowadays Shirish is besotted with his daughters and our conversation revolves around what the babies do. Of course twice a week, Shirish and I go out for cozy lunches when the babies are sleeping. I think the babies have strengthened our marriage because now we both have a common goal.
Was it a conscious decision to have kids at such a later age? Marrying at a later age was not at all a conscious decision on my part. It was not a choice. The fact is that I did not find any one earlier because I was into my career and did not want to get married for the wrong reasons. It is because of my late marriage that I delivered my babies also late.
What are your future plans as far as your babies are concerned?
I think it is too early to think of the future of our babies. We do not want to plan at this stage what they will do when they become big. I think it will be silly for Shirish or me to say that Czar will be a doctor or Diva will be a director. Let them grow up and decide what they want to do in life.
What do you plan to inculcate in your children's upbringing? What are the qualities that yoju want your kids to imbibe when they grow up? Have you also thought about how you would be able to help them to imbibe the same? Mine and Sajid's upbringing as children was quite liberal by our parents. We were not forced to follow any religion or do anything that we did not want to do. We were encouraged to read good books, watch good films and discuss about them with each other. I should say that sense of humor runs in the family. Even Shirish's sense of
“I am family as far as Shah Rukh and Gauri are concerned and like any concerned friend, both Shah Rukh Khan and Gauri kept on advising me on what I should do and what I should not do.”
humor is cutting and black.
Is it true that you are planning to launch Happy New Year? I am working on the script of my next film Happy New Year for Shah Rukh Khan. I had actually shelved the idea of making this film earlier but now we have decided to revive it after making the requisite changes in the script. I won't work for seven days a week like I used to earlier before I delivered the babies.
Any tips for first time moms? I cannot physically look after my babies because I have three of them but I would advise first time moms not to feel guilty for not being able to do everything for their babies. If they can afford it, they should not shy from getting help. I do not remember who fed me milk when I was a child or who cleaned my diaper. Your baby will remember only the quality time that you spend with it. I'd advise moms to enjoy the baby and not get so hyper and stressed looking after the baby trying to be the perfect mom in the world.
What is your advice to women who want to have kids when they are in their 40's? My advice to women who are in their 40's and wish to have kids is to go ahead and have them because I feel it is better late than never.
At any stage of your pregnancy, were you scared because you had a late pregnancy? I have never been the one who gets scared by anything in life, including pregnancy. I was all the time excited and happy to be a mother, that too of not one or two but three kids.
You shot for Om Shanti Om even when you were heavily pregnant. Was it a good idea to go against your doctor's advise especially keeping in mind your age and the fact that you were carrying more than one kid? I was active without being stupid. I had a firm to finish. In fact being active even at that stage of pregnancy actually helped me, because I could avoid not only body bloating but also feet swelling because I was on my toes.
Did you receive any parenting ideas from Shah Rukh Khan or Gauri? Of course I am family as far as Shah Rukh and Gauri are concerned and like any concerned friend, both Shah Rukh Khan and Gauri kept on advising me on what I should do and what I should not do, especially since they were more experienced as parents.
Has your perspective of life changed after becoming a parent? I have been the same Farah Khan, whether I am a parent or not, because the qualities that Sajid and I have imbibed from our parents continue to guide us through our lives. It is just that after delivering three kids, I have become slightly more mature but basically at heart I continue to be the same old Farah as far as my friends and colleaguies are concerned, though I may be the mother of triplets.