THINGS YOU CAN LEARN FROM A BREAK-UP
How to make the best of it.
Breaking up with someone is never easy and it becomes even worse when you are the one being dumped. While there are many lessons you can learn from a break-up, it is still a very lonely experience. When the relationship is officially over, you get into a web of what ifs and whys. But instead of thinking about all of this, why not try and think about the lessons you learnt from that relationship?
Every relationship, whether good or bad, always has a lesson behind it. It taught you what you want – and, more importantly, what you don’t want – in your next relationship.
EVERY RELATIONSHIP, WHETHER GOOD OR BAD, ALWAYS HAS A LESSON BEHIND IT. IT TAUGHT YOU WHAT YOU WANT – AND MORE IMPORTANTLY, WHAT YOU DON’T WANT – IN YOUR NEXT RELATIONSHIP. BREAK-UP IS HARD, BUT ITS LESSONS ARE ENLIGHTENING. THAT IS THE BEAUTY OF LIFE – YOU ALWAYS FIND A TRUTH IN PARADOX.
Break-up is hard, but its lessons are enlightening. That is the beauty of life – you always find a truth in paradox.
Your happiness and validation comes from within:
You don’t need a relationship to be happy. While you might feel overwhelmed with the pain of having broken up, you need to understand, there is much more to life than being in a relationship with someone, especially when that someone did not treat you right. Staying in a relationship at the cost of your selfrespect is never the right decision to make.
The pain abbs slowly:
The pain does go away. You might not want to hear it now, but it is true. Time heals all wounds and as difficult as it may be to believe, the pain dims after a while. However, you have to allow yourself to heal. As a defence mechanism, you will find the memories being less painful or as sharp over time, so let them fade. Make it easier for yourself by cutting off all contacts with your ex, even if it means unfriending him on social media so that you can’t stalk him (and make yourself miserable) even if you want to.
Love is not enough to make a relationship last:
As much as we would like to believe in all those fairy tales where love is enough, it is not so. To make a relationship last, unfortunately, love is not enough. Of course, it is very important but the way our significant other treats us, is just as important, if not more. According to Howard Markman, PHD, "We kill love by how we treat our partners, by not handling negative feelings well."
No matter what anyone says, you can’t change someone if they don’t want to.
It probably was for the best that you and your partner broke up if you remember having a lot of discussions of things that were
You can’t change someone:
displeasing to you. While opposites do attract, you want to make sure that your partner is satisfying your needs without having to ask them over and over again.
Learn what you want and what you don’t want in a relationship:
Another really important lesson to be learned is getting to know what you want and what you don’t want in a relationship. Break-ups help you figure out what it is that you really need when you are involved in a relationship. This will help you understand what your heart really wants and, finally, will be able to give it the same.
There are more fish in the sea:
Sometimes, the end of a relationship can leave you feeling completely worthless, unlovable, unattractive and unappealing to other men. However, that’s not really the case. There are many men out there who would be interested in you and while it is not a good idea to start a relationship on a rebound, meeting men and dating again can do wonders for your battered selfesteem. Still, do take enough time off to heal, resolve your own issues and insecurities before you dip into the dating pool again.
Friends are life:
True friends help you pick up your pieces when you are down and miserable after a break-up. They are the ones who will always be there by your side, and there is nothing better than a break-up to show it.
No relationship is a waste of time:
Whatever you do, never view this relationship as a failure or as a waste of your time, no matter how long you and your partner were together for. None of these lessons would be learnt without a break-up.
In fact, think of it this way: a break-up is actually a blessing; it is just a conspiracy of the universe to lead you to your soulmate. So, happy break-ups, folks, till you find the one.