Will You Marry Me?

Maxx-brides - - LOVE BOUND -

Text by Ester Pan­di­an­gan| Pho­tog­ra­pher: DS Dhiemazs­a­pu­tra Pho­tog­ra­phy +62 878 517 9215 | Stylist: AJ

Suit by Bie Hien Tai­lor| Gown by Cezsz by Francesa Ra­har­jdo | Hair Piece by Le Ciel De­sign by Yul­ing Mod­els: Arif & Dianna Lo MC Model Man­age­ment | Lo­ca­tion: Paku­won Golf & Fam­ily Club, Surabaya

When I was in col­lege, I dreamt I would be mar­ried by the time I was 24. Now I’m 29 and I still haven’t had a man say, like Jerry Maguire to Dorothy, that I com­plete him. When I get to­gether with my girl friends, the talk of­ten turns to our wed­ding dreams. One friend, a climber, wants her man to pro­pose to her on the sum­mit of some soar­ing peak. An­other friend has turned 30 and her de­sire to get mar­ried is be­gin­ning to turn to des­per­a­tion. My mom got mar­ried when she was 23. Most women of her gen­er­a­tion mar­ried young. More women of my gen­er­a­tion are putting off mar­riage as they fo­cus on their education and ca­reers. “When will you get mar­ried?” It’s a ques­tion we women are used to hear­ing once we reach a cer­tain age and our fam­ily and friends think it is time we set­tled down. And it is a ques­tion that can make some women rush to find a boyfriend or, if they are al­ready in a re­la­tion­ship, to start drop­ping hints to their boyfriends that it is time to tie the knot. But is it a good idea to get mar­ried be­cause you are tired of the ques­tions, be­cause you are afraid of be­ing alone, be­cause you are in a re­la­tion­ship and get­ting mar­ried is what peo­ple in a re­la­tion­ship do? I have been think­ing about this a lot and I don’t want th­ese to be the rea­sons I get mar­ried. I want to get mar­ried be­cause I am in love with some­one I want to spend the rest of my life with and build a fam­ily with. I want to get mar­ried be­cause I have found some­one I can’t imag­ine my life with­out. I guess it no longer re­ally mat­ters who pro­poses to who. Ladies, if you think it’s time to take the next step, just say so with­out send­ing weird sig­nals to your man and hop­ing he gets the mes­sage. If you don’t know how to start the con­ver­sa­tion, here are some sug­ges­tions to help you ask your man to start the next chap­ter.

• Firstly, you must as­sess the sit­u­a­tion. Don’t raise the topic when he is in a bad mood or dis­tracted by work or fam­ily mat­ters. Don’t is­sue threats or ul­ti­ma­tums, telling him the re­la­tion­ship is over if he doesn’t marry you soon. Say­ing that all your friends are get­ting mar­ried, so it is the right time for you two to take the plunge, is not the best way to ask your man to marry you. • Make sure you and him are in a se­ri­ous re­la­tion­ship and that mar­riage is some­thing you have dis­cussed be­fore. • Make it hap­pen with his par­ents’

sup­port.

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