THE PHYSICS GURU’S SCRIBBLEPAD
MY 10 BEST GEEK JOKES
Get your geek on with us! We’ve travelled the four corners of the world and studied under the four joke masters. Well maybe we didn’t, but James Lloyd did spend a lot of time finding the best geek jokes – just for you.
Think science can’t be funny? Well, here are my favourite science in-jokes that should bring a smile to your face - especially if youre a bit of a geek like me... How many Microsoft programmers does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, the other to close any windows. Why are quantum physicists so poor at sex? Because when they have the position, they can’t find the momentum, and when they have the momentum, they can’t find the position. Why was the scarecrow so happy? Because he was outstanding in his field. Schrodinger’s cat walks into a bar. And doesn’t... A Higgs boson walks into a church, and the priest says: “What are you doing here?" The boson replies: “What do you mean? You can’t have Mass without me!" What do you do with a dead chemist? Barium. Did you hear about the biologist who had twins? She baptised one and kept the other as a control. My physics teacher says my understanding of forces is the worst he’s ever known. Personally, I think he’s just pushing my leg.
Do posh ducks emit quarks? What’s the difference between a seal and a sea lion? One electron.