Fat chance we’ll all end up overweight!
CHRISTMAS is coming and one in four of us is getting fat. Just what we needed to hear in the run-up to what is going to be the most miserable festive season in 20 years. Whereas last year we had the added pressure of a bulging wallet, this year it’s our waistlines that are creeping out over the edge. Turkeys and hams around Ireland must be doing cartwheels. But not the sprouts.
The Department of Education-backed report reveals that 47% of men and 70% of women are carrying a little too much excess baggage when they heave themselves aboard the scales. And with the majority of us eating double the amount of high fat and high sugar foods on a daily basis, the Health Service is bracing itself for ‘a timebomb’ in the next few years. Another souvenir for the mantlepiece in their already clustered bunker.
The Battle with the Bulge hasn’t come about today or yesterday but like all good governments, they have decided to give the people another little kick while they’re already down.
Seven years ago a little boy walked into my classroom in Jinju, South Korea. He was a stocky little fellow and it was obvious from looking at him that he had been putting on a few pounds. It was only when he sat down on that particular morning that the button on his trousers burst and went spinning across the room. The rest of the class found it hysterically amusing. The little boy explained that McDonald’s was to blame and that he had eaten too many burgers in recent times.
Obesity, like any other illness is something that needs help to be controlled. At present there is just one clinic in Loughlinstown, Dublin, and it has a three-year-waiting list. There is talk of two more being set up in Cork and Galway. Until the consultants get round to finding the time to have a word then, the responsibilty lies with ourselves.
There are days when exercise might feel as attractive as sticking a needle in your eye but in the long-term it’s the body that benefits and we might even earn ourselves a few extra years to celebrate a few more slices of apple pie. Now, should I have garlic chips or taco fries after my pints tonight...
DO IT FOR THE FANS
PREMIERSHIP footballers here’s a challenge for you. Let’s see just how much you care about the fans of the club you play for. In desperate times, why not take a 10% pay-cut (or more if you like) and enable your club to cut the cost of tickets for the worshipping masses. Then when we see you puckering up to your badge on your shirt when you score a goal, we might actually believe some of it.
BERTIE’S TALL TALE
IT’S time to admit defeat. We are never going to see the back of Bertie Ahern. Not so long ago, the whole nation watched on while the bounty hunters went clawing for his blood. We waited for his day in court but Bertie outsmarted us all. He resigned. And then he threw them a Brian Cowen-dolly to play with instead.
But the latest news that Bertie is to receive a six-figure sum to pen his autobiography should have him up off the crutches and dancing yet another merry little jig. The only thing is, which best-seller list will it be competing in, fiction or non-fiction?
With Bertie you just never know.
Time waits for no man when it comes to keeping off the pounds!