me is freaking me out.
Beware my car may roll backwards when stopped on a hill.
A green light may not actually mean I move, but I am trying.
If I’m ahead of you at a roundabout you may be late for your appointment.
If you beep me I assure you I will conk out at least three times.
If you are a pedestrian crossing the road, good luck.
If you are a cyclist please do not be freaked out by my driving for miles behind you, followed by another hundred cars travelling behind me.
If we meet in a car park my apologies — I need at least two parking spaces.
Or perhaps a small bumper sticker would suffice?
‘Be kind. The real driver is sweating in the passenger seat.’