Irish Independent

Women’s Day is a joke and should be scrapped

- Barbara McCarthy: Bairbre Power p47

I’M TRYING to figure out what I should do on Internatio­nal Women’s Day today? Dust off my shrine to Hillary Clinton or Aung San Suu Kyi? Stand outside the Dáil demanding the repeal of the Eighth? Be offended by stuff ? I don’t know. Quite frankly, I’m not really in the loop. I think Internatio­nal Women’s Day is a joke and should be scrapped.

When I hear people talk about gathering outside the White House to march, I get a little confused. Is it 1919? Have we not got the vote yet and are we banned from pubs? Wait, I’ll grab my pantaloons and a pair of long boots and charge through Washington DC demanding change.

As a working single parent, on whose shoulders all responsibi­lity rests, financial and otherwise, I should be feeling sorry for myself on Internatio­nal Women’s Day.

How stretched am I? Looking through the pages of newspapers and magazines this week, all I see is photograph­s of female journalist­s with their kids going, “I’m so busy, I love my life, but oh the running around I have to do. Why do I do the lion’s share of caretaking, making school lunches, arranging playdates, etc, while my husband does nothing? ”

Would you like a medal perhaps? A purple heart for choosing to get married and have kids? How’s about you do all that stuff on your own, from hospital visits during pregnancy, to travelling alone to sorting out schools and paying for everything yourself?

I should get a photo of myself in my pyjamas, laptop in hand, with my daughter covered in chocolate jumping on my head, some saliva trickling down the side of my face, a glazed expression and a caption going ‘my poor-me single mother world’.

In reality, it’s hard, but you can still have a life. Despite what popular rhetoric would like you to believe, I have time for swimming, hiking, coffees, afternoon drinks, all that stuff. Why is it that mums in particular always feel they have to be wrecked in order to be credible?

I often wonder what mums with one kid do all day if they don’t work. I know I’m really pushing the boat out here. More than one child is different, but before that, it’s totally manageable and I don’t want to hear any ‘woe is me’ stuff.

Besides the self-pity at choices women make consciousl­y in life, what really annoys me about Internatio­nal Women’s Day is the group thing.

Rather than explain it in a nutshell, I shall steal wise words from the great George Carlin: “I love individual­s. I hate groups of people. I hate a group of people with a ‘common purpose’. Because pretty soon they have little hats. And armbands. And fight songs. And a list of people they’re going to visit at 3am. So, I dislike and despise groups of people. But I love individual­s.”

Once a philosophy goes tribal, its original belief structure is compromise­d as the interests of the herd take over.

Luckily this year we don’t have to hear the waffle from great philosophe­r of herd-think Michelle Obama, who will probably be spending Internatio­nal Women’s Day on a pedestal making life easier for women and girls. Yawn.

“My message to women: Do what makes you feel good, because there’ll always be someone who thinks you should do it differentl­y. Whether your choices are hits or misses, at least they’re your own?” she said.

What kind of gobbledygo­ok is this? We make our own choices in the West. Also, no one cares what other people do, because everyone is so self-serving these days.

Except Emma Watson, of course – a trailblaze­r of the ‘Time’s Up’ movement. Whatever that is. In an effort to be street, she made a fool of herself at the Oscars with said tattoo on her arm. Lol. Time’s up, darling. On you and your selfimport­ance.

So rather than go around saying #ustoo #imwithher #timesup, #metoo, #moo, I think on Internatio­nal Women’s Day we should just be men for the day. Be non-committal, say you have to do your thing, accidental­ly say hurtful stupid stuff, don’t listen while your man is trying to tell you something, make decisions with only yourself in mind.

Ladies, we won. In the West. We have gender balance. In the UK, there are more female doctors than male doctors, which means that by the time they have children, a second doctor needs to be trained up, costing taxpayers over €600,000. Why? Because, most female doctors end up working part-time and then retire early once they have kids. But let’s not mention that part.

In the 1960s and 70s, bra-burning feminists protested to gain equal rights in the workplace, universiti­es, health care, and in the home. Now we’re protesting because a female in Hollywood got fewer lines than her male co-star. Maybe that’s why she gets paid less?

Let’s abandon this entire notion of victimhood. Scrap Internatio­nal Women’s Day and remind yourself: ‘I don’t want to be like men. I’m happy being a woman, being completely different, having a heart. That kind of thing. Let’s just celebrate that.’

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