Soap

The Irish Mail on Sunday - TV Week - - YOUR MOVIE PLANNER -

An Amer­i­can drama that doesn’t fea­ture an iPad is like a beach with­out sea: you just don’t see it, and nor would you want to. The iPad has re­placed pen and pa­per as the means by which ev­ery­one shares in­for­ma­tion with their col­leagues and, on the rare oc­ca­sions they are not us­ing one, they are sit­ting at their desks in front of a Mac com­puter.

Prod­uct-place­ment rules mean that British and Ir­ish dra­mas fea­ture less iden­ti­fi­able brands, and nowhere is this more true than in soap. Have you no­ticed in EastEn­ders, for ex­am­ple, that ev­ery­one has the same tone on their phone when a text comes in? In real life, even the bus has a ver­i­ta­ble or­ches­tra of tones on dif­fer­ent de­vices.

No one in Wal­ford has an iPhone, ei­ther. How un­re­al­is­tic is that? When Ben called Phil from the bath­room this week, shortly be­fore Shirley tried to re- Chris­ten him in the bath (Hur­ray! You go for it, girl!), I swear the phone he was us­ing was barely one up from car­rier pi­geon in the com­mu­ni­ca­tion stakes. And who spells out their en­tire con­ver­sa­tion these days, as the EastEn­ders in­vari­ably do? DONT U C NOT COOL?

Coro­na­tion Street is even more an­ti­quated. Roy’s phone is a JCB of a mon­ster hang­ing on the wall. And the ring­tone on the phone at the hospi­tal where Tracy was in­car­cer­ated would have had Alexan­der Gra­ham Bell reach­ing for his ear-plugs. And – most cu­ri­ous of all – in soa­p­land no­body ever com­plains about the cost of their phone bills.

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