The Irish Mail on Sunday - TV Week - - MOVIE OF THE WEEK -

I have come 15th on a list of things that most em­bar­rass Bri­tish peo­ple about be­ing Bri­tish. Even worse than me, ac­cord­ing to the Ask Jeeves poll, are fel­low Brits on hol­i­day, re­al­ity TV shows, lit­ter, MPs, the Eng­land foot­ball team, bankers, One Di­rec­tion and (pleas­ingly) Si­mon Cow­ell.

But I am ap­par­ently con­sid­ered more cringe-wor­thy than warm beer, Gor­don Ram­say, pub­lic trans­port, xeno­pho­bia and TV soaps.

On a pos­i­tive note, I was re­lieved to see ‘D-list celebri­ties’ ap­pear sep­a­rately at No 5, the clear im­pli­ca­tion be­ing that I’m not one of those.

That re­ally would be em­bar­rass­ing.

Manch­ester City’s cap­tain Vincent Kom­pany chor­tled with de­light on Twit­ter tonight when his for­mer club came back from 0-3 down to Arse­nal to draw 3-3.

‘ OMG!! Ande r le cht !! ex­claimed.

After I told him to ‘pipe down’, a bet­ter idea crossed my mind. ‘If I pay you £ 50 mil­lion, will you come and play for us?’ ‘Great club but no,’ he replied. Un­de­ter red, I upped the bid. ‘£60 mil­lion and two Fer­raris?’ ‘Those days have gone, Pear­sie,’ he re­torted (I for­give the typo on my name as he’s Bel­gian). ‘I play for glory.’

’ he

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