CLAUDIA CONNELL’S ultimate insight into the week’s soaps
inding childcare in the real world, as any parent will tell you, is a tricky and expensive business. If only they could access some of those 24-hour, seven- day-a-week facilities that soap characters seem to get their hands on so effortlessly. Take the Coronation Street babies – that must be some understanding child-minder that Kevin, Tyrone, Katy and Izzy have. It appears she’ll happily look after the kids from first thing in the morning until late at night, while her charges’ parents booze it up in the pub or the Bistro.
The wellbeing of children in Walford is a concern as well. Kat will make vague references to picking Tommy up from ‘nursery’, but who is looking after the twins all day while she works on the market stall? Where are Janet and Lexi, while Billy and Lola prop up the Queen Vic every night? The kids of Emmerdale are seen a little more often but that doesn’t stop Marlon and Laurel constantly fretting over five-year-old April most nights... from their usual table at The Woolpack. Is it any wonder soap kids end up going so spectacularly off the rails? It’s Mick’s birthday and, as we know all l too well, Carter birthdays don’t tend to be e happy occasions. Shirley arrives with a gift for her brother-turned-son and doesn’tt miss an opportunity to lay into Linda, , accusing her of lying about Dean.
The next day Mick takes Linda to the e police station to formerly report the rape (above), and later they realise they have to tell their children what’s happened. They decide to break the news to Nancy and Lee over one of their famous family meals. Predictably, all hell breaks loose with Lee losing his temper and later attacking Dean.
It’s all too much for Stan, whose health is rapidly deteriorating. He asks a huge favour of Mick and Tina – and it’s nothing to do with borrowing Mick’s car or Tina’s fake tan.
Elsewhere, Sharon discovers Ben has accidentally handed The Arches over to Max and tries to reason with him that he should give it back. Three guesses how th that t worksk out.t
Things aren’t looking good for Phil, who is still banged up, with no means to get himself out. At least it gives us the chance to count how many times he can say ‘Old Bill’ in one episode.
Here’s the crazy thing: the Mitchells know the truth about Nick being responsible for tampering with Roxy’s car, but they don’t want to get Charlie in trouble for harbouring his dad.
The scriptwriters have tied themselves up in serious knots with this whole Nick and Charlie fake death, fake copper storyline, and the sooner it’s brought to an end the better.
LINDA GOES TO THE POLICE RIERIGNCITIETDFYLAME
FOR CHARITY AND CAIN?
A CLIFFHANGER OF A COACH TRIP
ALL IN A NAME
ALL’S FAIR IN LOVE AND WORK