She was wrong all along

Jamaica Gleaner - - SEX & RELATIONSHIPS - Krysta An­der­son Gleaner Writer krysta.an­der­son@glean­erjm.com

FEL­LAS, YOU know how they say, to know her is to love her? Well, what hap­pens when while meet­ing a girl, you’re greeted by that bad feel­ing? Then, you de­cide to give her the ben­e­fit of the doubt, but as time goes on, she just adds in­sult to in­jury? Then she’d prob­a­bly be only con­firm­ing your ini­tial be­lief that she was wrong all along.

Meet 31-year-old Mark Ross*. Ross, an en­tre­pre­neur, found him­self in a tan­gled web when he met 32year-old ther­a­pist Fay Wright*. He knew from the get-go that some­thing was a lit­tle wrong with Wright but he some­how went along with it. A first strike for him: her ap­proach.

Ross and Wright met at a get­to­gether and Wright, who ap­peared in­ter­ested in Ross, sent a mes­sage to him through their mu­tual friend, pro­fess­ing her at­trac­tion to­wards him.

The al­pha male had now be­come the prey.

In­trigued by the role re­ver­sal, he de­cided to ex­plore the pos­si­bil­ity and made his way over to her ta­ble. “When I went over, she started play­ing hard to get. For in­stance, she wanted to dance but in­stead of ask­ing me, she tried forc­ing my hand in ask­ing her. The con­ver­sa­tion was stiff and forced. It all be­came too con­fus­ing for a first en­counter,” he ex­plained to the Flair.

THE FIRST SIGN

So when she an­nounced she was leav­ing early, he took that as a sign, let out a sigh of re­lief and re­turned to the fes­tiv­i­ties. Only to hear that she was in the park­ing lot wait­ing for him. “When I got out there, she asked me if I wasn’t go­ing to take her num­ber. So we ex­changed, for peace of mind, and so be­gun the se­ries of ‘Why did I ever de­cide to date Fay Wright?’ he said, rid­dled with de­spair by the mem­ory.

The two ‘love­birds’ ex­changed words via chat, but Ross con­fessed that he was thrown off by their con­ver­sa­tion. “Right off the bat, she started ask­ing me about my job, my five-year plan, any­thing workre­lated. It was hard to get a word in, so I just didn’t bother to. She got the hint, but tried re­verse psy­chol­ogy to see if I would come around. No such luck on her part,” he said. So, they had gone their sep­a­rate ways. Or so he thought. A year later would prove oth­er­wise.

“I sent out an e-blast to ev­ery­one in my con­tacts about my website, not re­mem­ber­ing that she was there. She re­sponded to the email, won­der­ing if that was meant for her, or just a for­ward,” he said. Time had passed and he was at a dif­fer­ent place, but Wright re­mained set in her pur­suit. She man­aged to weasel her­self into a first date and of­fered to pick him up. “When she reached the house, I saw her get out of the car. I thought she was com­ing in for a hug but in­stead she went to the pas­sen­ger’s side and had a seat. I asked what was up, and she told me to drive.” Ross found it strange that this woman who barely knew him was in­struct­ing him to drive her car. The date he de­scribed as a visit to ‘Dullsville’ in­cluded her talk­ing about work, and find­ing out more about his plans.

As time slowly moved on, she grew jeal­ous and possessive. “She wanted to call all the shots, and be­cause she was al­ways so busy with work, the re­la­tion­ship or courtship would be on her terms. She was a lit­tle too con­trol­ling for my lik­ing, but she meant well, and came from a sin­cere place, so I re­mained pos­i­tive.”

MIND GAMES

Un­til, he pointed out, she started play­ing mind games. “She tried to get me to say I love her about two weeks into our dat­ing: I would not lie about how I felt, and asked that she give me time to fig­ure out my feel­ings. She then got mad about me not want­ing her. Get­ting up­set and tak­ing it out on me had a new low for her.” He con­tin­ued, “She wanted to make a man feel like the man, with­out him ac­tu­ally be­ing a man. So he had to drive the car, carry her shop­ping, ac­com­pany her to events: it didn’t mat­ter he was the one spend­ing or even mak­ing the money. As long she got to have her arm candy by her side, she was good.”

Then there were ob­vi­ous rea­sons for his ‘unattrac­tion’, he said. “She was bril­liant, but lacked per­son­al­ity, so it was hard for us to re­late to each other. She was un­kempt and kept her place un­tidy. I am a ger­mo­phobe so I just could not stand for that. She claimed to be a Chris­tian, and I re­spected her wishes. Af­ter all, I was get­ting to know her, but then she would do ev­ery­thing in her power to get the ball rolling in the love­mak­ing depart­ment and then turn it around on me when I did noth­ing with her ad­vances, that I didn’t want her. The sex, when we did have it, wasn’t great ei­ther. So why was I even try­ing?”

But the straw which broke the camel’s back was one day when she ac­com­pa­nied him to go house hunt­ing. She threw a jeal­ous tantrum over the pos­si­ble land­lord, a fe­male, and she warned him to not drive her car the way he was do­ing. He brought the ve­hi­cle to a screech­ing halt and stepped out of it to con­tinue his search alone. “Af­ter an­other in­ci­dent in her home, soon af­ter, her semi-apol­ogy in­cluded that in all her case stud­ies, the man is al­ways wrong, so that’s what we were all along: a case study. Long­est and worst two months of my life!”

*Names changed upon re­quest

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