Decluttering
Some years ago, my younger daughter introduced me to a series of novels that follows the adventures and wanderings of Jack Reacher, a former U.S. Army military police officer. The author, Lee Child, was a new writer for me as I normally don’t read thrillers. However, the books were engrossing, and I immediately liked the main character, Jack Reacher (he appears in all 22 books penned by this prolific author, who has been spinning out one or two best-sellers every year since his debut in 1997). The thing that impresses me most is Jack Reacher’s austere lifestyle of owning nothing. He is a wanderer without baggage of any kind other than some cash and a toothbrush. He wears the same simple clothes every day, and discards them every few days after acquiring new ones.
How admirable! When I consider all the stuff we own after nearly 50 years of steady acquisition, Jack Reacher’s simplicity has inspired me to declutter.
I am determined to work to give away, donate or throw away two or three items around the house every day. Fortunately one of the charity groups we are involved with has a thrift shop to which we can donate a bag or two as things get emptied out of our closets and drawers. We also have an organization through which we can send nearly new clothing and shoes to Haiti. This has been a big challenge for me, but I am determined to follow my mother-in-law’s good example of simplifying her possessions for her children before her death.
Why do we have so much? For me, one of the reasons is that I have too many hobbies. Pottery making, watercolor painting, quilt-making, sewing, indoor gardening, writing, weaving and a passion for photography and art generate myriad bundles of miscellaneous things scat- tered around our small apartment. We recently visited our cousin’s new house nearby, and the first thing I noticed was the ample and well-organized storage space in each room.
But we are not going to expand our living space by buying a house just to make room for stuff. Six years ago, we chose to live in an apartment knowing we would downsize our possessions. We donated and disposed of truckloads of stuff then. We even shipped two containers of Korean antiques and other useful or meaningful (we hope) things to our daughters’ houses in DC. And yet, we still have too much. I am not despairing. I will keep working to bring our possessions under control.
What else in our lives do we need to declutter? People who are negative, narcissistic, unloving and full of anger. I finally arrived at an age where I can recognize toxic people and have the guts to eliminate them from my circle. This is a new phenomenon for me. I used to think that I was in no position to judge and avoid others. I now accept the reality of my limitations, and recognize the negative effects some people can have on me. As I am not strong enough to withstand and influence them in a positive way, I recognize my defeat and walk away. It is not a pleasant thing but I need to keep my own peace of mind.
Another area for decluttering is food. I know it’s tough to tackle a new way of eating but unhealthy food has to be removed from our diet. Indeed, the cliche that “we are what we eat” seems to be a fact. I notice the difference in my body and how I feel when I consume too much carbohydrates and sugary stuff. I am trying to be careful about what I allow myself to put into my mouth. I know staying healthy and having a good quality of life is one way of loving our two daughters. They will be less burdened by our ill-health and we can be of use to their lives as we stay in good health and spirits. Of course, we need our daily exercise to keep in shape.
Finally, in addition to these disciplines of watching our relationships and diet, we need to maintain a good attitude and a loving, kind, and grateful heart while decluttering all other undesirable thoughts from our mind. For me this comes from some “soul work.” My spiritual anchor comes from Bible reading and having quiet time talking and listening to God. Whatever the method you follow, soul work is one thing that can never be neglected. It is difficult, but even more essential, because of our hectic schedules and fast pace of life that rob us of the contemplative time we need to ponder upon the principal reason for our existence.
We will do well to heed Buddha’s teaching: “Just as a candle cannot burn without fire, we cannot live without a spiritual life.”