Long live Thabo Thakalekoala
SCRUTATOR is deeply disturbed by reports that some scumbags zooming around in a dilapidated Toyota camry tried to kill our venerable prime ministerial spokesman Thabo Thakalekoala.
As I read Thakalekoala’s narration of his assassination attempt ordeal last week, my mind ran sprints.
I could not help but imagine how boring our political life could become without the meticulous service of our immensely handsome prime minister’s spokesman.
Thakalekoala is not only among the most good looking guys in town, he has an infectious sense of humour, disarming charm and when he is in a good mood, he is a jolly good fellow to be around.
Ihave had the huge honour of attending Prime Minister Tom Thabane’s press conferences convened by Thakalekoala. They are not your ordinary press conferences. They resemble political rallies.
Thakalekoala always begins them with a long introduction and rendition of how and why Thabane has asked him to convene the pressers.
on a few occasions, he speaks more at the pressers than the PM himself. Through Thakalekoala, I have learnt the benefits of appointing a loyal cadre to speak for you, if you are anyone who deserves to appoint a spokesman.
should I ever become prime minister one day, which I am sure I will once I swap my pen for politics, I will certainly recall Thakalekoala to office (that is if the scum bags who made an attempt on his life don’t try it again and he remains around).
He is the archetypal activist spokesman that any Prime Minister or President in trouble deserves.
Thakalekoala tells it like it is. sometimes he confuses his role as a civil servant to his other as a politician. But there is no problem with that, particularly in our highly politicizsed civil service.
Witness the highly charged epithets and venom Thakalekoala regularly dispatches against former Prime Minister, Mr size Two.
Those with good memories will know that Phakalita Mosisili once jailed Thakalekoala after he described the former premier as a foreigner who should never have ruled in Lesotho for the prolonged period Mr size Two was in charge.
now Thakalekoala is having his revenge.
even though I think he sometimes goes over the top in his diatribes against Mr size Two, it all proves the importance of every politician having a loyal cadre speaking for them.
A former journalist and radio announcer, Thakalekoala can also be loquacious and vulgar in his deliveries.
That makes him a very interesting figure who must stick around to enlighten our dour political landscape.
If ever there is an appointment that Thabane applied his mind to before making, it must be that of Thakalekoala. not only does the PM and his spokesman complement each other in the handsome stakes, Thakalekoala serves his boss wholeheartedly against all his enemies.
could there be a possibility that those who wanted to harm Thakalekoala could in fact have confused him with the PM, partly because of their similar good looks?
We all know the PM is most vulnerable and daggers remain drawn against him. We will only know the full truth when police investigations have been completed and the scum bags have been apprehended.
My message to them is simple: Leave our prime ministerial press secretary alone.
We love him and like him, not only for his acerbic performances but also because he is indeed a good man.
If FHM magazine had not closed, Thakalekoala would certainly have been a prime candidate to ardon one of its covers. For the ignorant among us, FHM is that glossy magazine which made its name from splashing pretty faces of beautiful men and women on its covers.
American politicians, who more than any others need good spokesmen because of the rigorous nature of their country’s politics, are not doing themselves any favours by not seconding their spokesmen to Thakalekoala for some training.
Long Live Thakalekoala and damn all the beasts seeking a premature end to your vibrant and interesting life.
Scrutator has repeatedly emphasized that the planned February 2015 elections are the only way to get us out of our current political predicament and to put a permanent end to our Loo- ney Tunes coalition government.
This is why I am disturbed by information that even though the dissolution of Parliament will go ahead, some scoundrel politicians are determined to sabotage the February 2015 elections.
This is because these politicians, who are MPs and senators, had accessed the M500 000 loans extended to legislators as part of their benefits structure.
Apparently these politicians want the government to write-off these loans arguing the February 2015 election will cut their terms and if they lose their seats, like many will certainly do, they will no longer have access to salaries to service the interest free loans.
This all confirms what I have said before that most Basotho see politics as the best career from which to make a decent living, hence the proliferation of all the aunt and nephew political parties or husband, wife and illegitimate child political parties that we have. I am informed that whenever a new Parliament is elected, the first order of business for many MPs is to submit applications for these loans.
Their argument that their ability to service the loans is diminished by the cutting of the five year life of Parliament is nevertheless as inane as it is stupid.
What a huge pity that these MPs don’t see it.
Unless the government makes a firm decision to write-off these loans, these MPs would rather have the February elections not go- ing ahead and seek a restoration of their status as MPs.
They obviously don’t care that the continuation of the Tom and Jerry coalition beyond February 2015 will be tragic for this country.
some of the MPs have also been as useless scum bags as those who wanted to harm our beloved Thakalekoala.
They never showed up in their constituencies hence their fear to lose in the election.
That cannot absolve them from paying the money from hard pressed Basotho taxpayers.
When you borrow money from a bank, you must repay it regardless of whether you lose your job or not.
If ever a decision is made to write-off these loans for these errant MPs, we must all protest until the fires of hell become ice and then we dance on that ice.
Those following the news will be aware of a new political phenomenon taking root in Southern Africa; that of first ladies seeking to replace their husbands as presidents or prime ministers.
It started in Zimbabwe with that paragon of academic excellence, Grace Mugabe, publicly announcing that she wants to replace her husband.
Apparently, Grace established international notoriety for producing exceptionally poor marks at all the reputable universities she attempted to obtain a degree from.
The University of London in fact expelled her to safeguard its reputation. But mysteriously, the University of Zimbabwe saw it fit to afford her a doctorate in orphanages after only eight weeks of study.
Buoyed by this qualification, she immediately announced her candidacy to replace her soon to be 91year old husband.
Not to be outdone, christine Kaseba-sata, the widow of late Zambian president Michael sata, is now also vying to replace her husband and is fighting tooth, nail and claw to become the Patriotic Front’s candidate in elections due end of January 2015.
The Zambians are civilised enough to call for fresh elections within three months of the death of an incumbent President.
This always ensures that whoever is president has a direct mandate from the people. Unfortunately, the Zambians always elect old yesteryear politicians.
This is the second time they are going for elections to replace a dead president. But that’s besides the point. The news is that christine thinks she is the perfect replacement for her husband.
“Because we shared a bed every day. I exactly know what he always thought and how he always thought. I am thus the best candidate to carry forward his legacy and save the Patriotic Front,” thundered christine in a media interview last week.
Across the border in south Africa, there is unsubstantiated information that Makhumalo, the 73-year old first wife of Jacob Zuma is considering seeking high office as well.
I must confess my love for MaKhumalo. she is the most decent in Zuma’s kraal of dozens of wives and concubines.
even though the source of her suddenly found wish to replace her philandering, dancing and singing husband is somewhat controversial –– the blabbermouth Loyiso Gola.
There is no reason to discount it since it is the fashionable thing among the wives and girlfriends of regional leaders these days.
The only regional country in which there is no chance at all of a first lady replacing her husband is, of course, Botswana. That is because there is no First Lady there.
scrutator shall not regurgitate rumours about Ian seretse Khama’s sexual orientation, lest I open a pandora’s box.
What is clear nevertheless is that there seem to be a well-orchestrated plan by regional first ladies to take over from their husbands.
so my quick question is; Where does mama Liabiloe Ramoholi fit in all this?
Has she had a word with her fellow first ladies in the region? If so, shall we expect an announcement soon.
ntante Thabane is 75. still far much younger than Mugabe and full of energy.
But sooner or later, he will need a replacement at the apex of both Lesotho and the ABc. If you haven’t given it much thought, all I can say is go for it Liabiloe? It will be interesting to have a first female Prime Minister twiddling her fingers in state House.
PM’S spokesman Thabo Thakalekoala