Mak­ing It Work Like A Man

CLEO (Malaysia) - - CONTENTS -

Man up in the of­fice!


Men – you can’t live with them, you can’t live with­out them. And that ap­plies every­where, in­clud­ing your of­fice. De­spite the ten­dency of most women to re­coil and dis­like the hard-cut­ting, con­temp­tu­ous na­ture men usu­ally take on in the of­fice at­mos­phere, th­ese traits if any­thing seem to have boosted them in their path to suc­cess. In­stead of shov­ing it aside, it’s about time we em­braced it!


Here’s the thing that a lot of ladies out there get them­selves con­fused with. They think that be­ing self-fo­cused is equiv­a­lent to be­ing self­ish. This couldn’t be fur­ther from the truth al­though it’s un­der­stand­able why this com­mon mis­con­cep­tion ex­ists. Women are gen­er­ally brought up in an en­vi­ron­ment that moulds them into putting oth­ers be­fore them­selves. Where it is jus­ti­fied in sit­u­a­tions like mar­riage and fam­ily, prac­tis­ing mar­tyr­dom at work is an of­fice haz­ard! Most men don’t do things to please oth­ers; they do what’s best for them. So for ex­am­ple if you’re tak­ing on tasks that aren’t re­quired of you or aren’t de­vel­op­ing your skills in any way, don’t be afraid to say no. Or take credit where it’s due be­cause it’s more than OK to drop the team­work card if the suc­cess is a re­sult of your hard work. If your mind is scream­ing out “ego­cen­tric fe­male”, think again. When you are happy and ful­filled, the will­ing­ness to help oth­ers comes more nat­u­rally to you rather than hav­ing a pre-no­tion that you must put your­self last.


If you were to ask your boyfriend about that fight that took place last week, there’s a fairly good chance he wouldn’t re­mem­ber it or why it even took place. Take a leaf out of his page be­cause it’s good to for­get that some things ever took place. Men have a ten­dency to not re­mem­ber things that are of lit­tle or no use and that in­cludes un­pleas­ant

in­ci­dents. Trash­ing out your past hic­cups and mis­takes at work is a good prac­tice be­cause hold­ing on to the mem­ory of your pre­vi­ous blun­ders could hin­der you from mov­ing for­ward at work. If say you worked on a par­tic­u­lar pro­ject and messed it up the last time, you shouldn’t run away from fu­ture projects of sim­i­lar na­ture. What you should do is un­der­stand and re­mem­ber the valu­able lessons you learnt from your mis­takes and try not to re­peat it.


When men fight, they fight a hard but clean fight (most of the time at least). They would talk, ar­gue and yell in ex­treme cases about the things that have dis­pleased them. But they stand their ground un­til they’ve made their points and have reached an am­i­ca­ble de­ci­sion and leave the past be­hind. Yes, of course they can be as re­sent­ful and ma­li­cious as some women can be but they of­ten choose to let it go. The next time you’re hav­ing a prob­lem with a col­league, say what’s on your mind, re­solve it on the spot, and start things on a clean slate with­out brew­ing any ha­tred. If your col­league still per­sists on be­ing a douche bag, do what men do best – walk away with­out giv­ing them any­more thought.


See a man in your of­fice who doesn’t say much about him­self but is climb­ing up the com­pany hi­er­ar­chy steadily? It’s prob­a­bly be­cause he’s more tac­i­turn and thick-skinned than you are. Don’t get the wrong idea though! Hav­ing an opin­ion of your own is great but that in­ces­sant chat­ter about your life isn’t. Di­vulging too much of your per­sonal prob­lems at work may make you look like you are go­ing through a lot of is­sues, al­though in re­al­ity you prob­a­bly aren’t. If this is how you ap­pear to your su­pe­ri­ors, pro­mo­tions would by­pass you be­cause you seem like you’ve got enough on your plate. All said and done though, it’s good to be a so­cial but­ter­fly as long as you know your lim­its. Also, when your boss is about to lose his or her cool at you, don the ever-ef­fec­tive cyn­i­cism­proof coat men of­ten wear. Be­cause of a guy’s abil­ity to with­stand heavy blows with­out break­ing down emo­tion­ally, they’re marked as stronger play­ers in the rat race. But just be­cause men don’t break­down within the of­fice vicin­ity doesn’t mean that they’re not af­fected. They just re­lease it in a health­ier way by work­ing out or hit­ting the gym to cool off the steam.


You know how peo­ple of­ten say as­sump­tion is the mother of all mes­sups? Well, the same goes with ex­pec­ta­tions and it’s some­thing women of­ten fall prey to. “In a highly com­pet­i­tive en­vi­ron­ment such as your of­fice, it is al­ways best to do things on your own and not ex­pect things to be done by oth­ers. In fact, the lesser ex­pec­ta­tions you have of oth­ers, the bet­ter be­cause you’re not set­ting your­self up for fail­ure or un­wanted dis­ap­point­ment,” says Al­bert, a 31-year-old lawyer. It’s a very cyn­i­cal ap­proach but not look­ing at the world be­hind rose-tinted glasses is just one of many rea­sons the op­po­site gen­der is of­ten a bet­ter can­di­date than us for pro­mo­tions.


Turn back time to when you were a kid and you’d re­alise that when­ever some­thing un­pleas­ant hap­pened to you, your par­ents would have been there to pick you up and com­fort you. But if the same thing hap­pened to your brother, chances are your dad would have given him a pat on the back and told him to suck it up – such was life for them. And that’s why men give out sym­pa­thy lesser than women. If a col­league has been given the boot or de­moted, men usu­ally don’t get in­volved. They’d prob­a­bly pass a box of tis­sue, say a word or two of com­fort awk­wardly, and be done with it. The more drama they stay away from, the more stress-free they are.

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