Making It Work Like A Man
Man up in the office!
YOU MIGHT NOT LIKE THEIR ROUGH-AND-TOUGH APPROACH BUT YOU SURE CAN A LEARN A THING OR TWO FROM MEN WHEN IT COMES TO BEING SUCCESSFUL AT WORK.
Men – you can’t live with them, you can’t live without them. And that applies everywhere, including your office. Despite the tendency of most women to recoil and dislike the hard-cutting, contemptuous nature men usually take on in the office atmosphere, these traits if anything seem to have boosted them in their path to success. Instead of shoving it aside, it’s about time we embraced it!
IT’S PRIMARILY ALL ABOUT YOU
Here’s the thing that a lot of ladies out there get themselves confused with. They think that being self-focused is equivalent to being selfish. This couldn’t be further from the truth although it’s understandable why this common misconception exists. Women are generally brought up in an environment that moulds them into putting others before themselves. Where it is justified in situations like marriage and family, practising martyrdom at work is an office hazard! Most men don’t do things to please others; they do what’s best for them. So for example if you’re taking on tasks that aren’t required of you or aren’t developing your skills in any way, don’t be afraid to say no. Or take credit where it’s due because it’s more than OK to drop the teamwork card if the success is a result of your hard work. If your mind is screaming out “egocentric female”, think again. When you are happy and fulfilled, the willingness to help others comes more naturally to you rather than having a pre-notion that you must put yourself last.
SELECTIVE SHORT-TERM MEMORY
If you were to ask your boyfriend about that fight that took place last week, there’s a fairly good chance he wouldn’t remember it or why it even took place. Take a leaf out of his page because it’s good to forget that some things ever took place. Men have a tendency to not remember things that are of little or no use and that includes unpleasant
incidents. Trashing out your past hiccups and mistakes at work is a good practice because holding on to the memory of your previous blunders could hinder you from moving forward at work. If say you worked on a particular project and messed it up the last time, you shouldn’t run away from future projects of similar nature. What you should do is understand and remember the valuable lessons you learnt from your mistakes and try not to repeat it.
STRIKE HARD BUT CLEAN
When men fight, they fight a hard but clean fight (most of the time at least). They would talk, argue and yell in extreme cases about the things that have displeased them. But they stand their ground until they’ve made their points and have reached an amicable decision and leave the past behind. Yes, of course they can be as resentful and malicious as some women can be but they often choose to let it go. The next time you’re having a problem with a colleague, say what’s on your mind, resolve it on the spot, and start things on a clean slate without brewing any hatred. If your colleague still persists on being a douche bag, do what men do best – walk away without giving them anymore thought.
TIGHT-LIPPED AND THICK-SKINNED
See a man in your office who doesn’t say much about himself but is climbing up the company hierarchy steadily? It’s probably because he’s more taciturn and thick-skinned than you are. Don’t get the wrong idea though! Having an opinion of your own is great but that incessant chatter about your life isn’t. Divulging too much of your personal problems at work may make you look like you are going through a lot of issues, although in reality you probably aren’t. If this is how you appear to your superiors, promotions would bypass you because you seem like you’ve got enough on your plate. All said and done though, it’s good to be a social butterfly as long as you know your limits. Also, when your boss is about to lose his or her cool at you, don the ever-effective cynicismproof coat men often wear. Because of a guy’s ability to withstand heavy blows without breaking down emotionally, they’re marked as stronger players in the rat race. But just because men don’t breakdown within the office vicinity doesn’t mean that they’re not affected. They just release it in a healthier way by working out or hitting the gym to cool off the steam.
BE A MISANTHROPIST
You know how people often say assumption is the mother of all messups? Well, the same goes with expectations and it’s something women often fall prey to. “In a highly competitive environment such as your office, it is always best to do things on your own and not expect things to be done by others. In fact, the lesser expectations you have of others, the better because you’re not setting yourself up for failure or unwanted disappointment,” says Albert, a 31-year-old lawyer. It’s a very cynical approach but not looking at the world behind rose-tinted glasses is just one of many reasons the opposite gender is often a better candidate than us for promotions.
LIMITED SYMPATHY AND SOCIALISING
Turn back time to when you were a kid and you’d realise that whenever something unpleasant happened to you, your parents would have been there to pick you up and comfort you. But if the same thing happened to your brother, chances are your dad would have given him a pat on the back and told him to suck it up – such was life for them. And that’s why men give out sympathy lesser than women. If a colleague has been given the boot or demoted, men usually don’t get involved. They’d probably pass a box of tissue, say a word or two of comfort awkwardly, and be done with it. The more drama they stay away from, the more stress-free they are.