Friends For­ever?

CLEO (Malaysia) - - EDITOR’S NOTE - Jing Shia

I used to think that friend­ships last for ever but grow­ing pains have taught me that they don’ t. To­day, I know they don’t have to. At age that 7, I had a play­mate I met re­li­giously ev­ery evening at the play­ground be­hind my house. We would share ice cream and play un­til sun­down; I no longer re­mem­ber her name. When I grad­u­ated pri­mary school and had to move to an­other town, my five BFFs gave me a 1-litre jar of origami stars and tear­fully promised to write ev­ery week. The flow of let­ters soon dried up af­ter a few semesters into Sec­ondary One. By then, I had two high school BFFs whom I thought would be with me un­til the end of time but dif­fer­ent goals and am­bi­tions soon had us go­ing our sep­a­rate ways.

Through­out my sec­ondary school years, I’ve made and lost groups of friends. It was like the Mean Girls’ club; one day you’re in, the next day you’re out. Col­lege mates and col­leagues were no dif­fer­ent. But here’s what I’ve come to re­alise – whether they’re three years or three months – th­ese friend­ships have broad­ened my hori­zon and they’re greater than the sum of its parts. Los­ing friends never get old and it hurts ev­ery time, es­pe­cially if you’ve had an in­tense con­nec­tion with the per­son. But some best friends aren’t meant to be for­ever; rather they were meant to help you deal with a tran­si­tion in your life. You know how some women be­lieve in Mr. Right Now? Well, I think there should also be a Friend for Now. In “The Other Kind Of Fling” (pg138), you’ll see that there’s absolutely noth­ing wrong with hav­ing a friend­ship with an ex­piry date.The real heartache is when we put ex­pec­ta­tions on those friend­ships. So what if your for­mer call-if-you-need-me-at-3am friend is now just a dis­tant ac­quain­tance on Face­book? She just had her sec­ond child? You didn’t know that! But do you know how much she meant to you and how happy you were then? Yes? Then that’s all that mat­ters. Some peo­ple ar e passers-by foot­prints in your heart and leave in your life but they also that’s what friends are for.

So, if I could tell my 12 year-old one thing in life, it’d be that noth­ing lasts for­ever – and that’s al­right. But I prom­ise you that CLEO will al­ways be your BFF in life. See you next month!

Who wouldn’t want to be­friend a smile like that?

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