First Date Faux Pas
You’re trying to bait the catch. Not have him running for the hills.
So here you both are. The restaurant is cosy but not too intimate. He’s cuter than you remember, the wine is flowing, and the date is panning out nicely. But just as you are evaluating his attitudes, opinions and behaviour, he is doing it right back to you. Here’s what you need to know to ensure you don’t blow your chance of a second date.
First, show up on time! No one will quibble over a few minutes but anything past the quarter-hour mark and he will be sitting alone with plenty of time to imagine a future filled with waiting for you outside stores and railway stations. While I’m sounding like your mum and dad, don’t dress too sexily. Again, this involves him projecting months and years ahead of men ogling you in his presence. We hate this so much because we’ve been those men and we know the filthy thoughts they’re thinking.
Leave your phone in your bag throughout the evening. If you must check in with a girlfriend or update your Twitter feed, do so in the privacy of the bathroom. The only thing you should be pulling out of your bag is your purse when the bill arrives. Not saying you should pay for dinner or even half of it. But you should offer, just as he should thank you and decline. Be careful when the subject of previous relationships comes up – it shouldn’t but it might. First dates aren’t for establishing whether you have similar long-term romance goals; they are for establishing whether you could possibly end up broaching this subject in a month or so. Mention kids, your
Mention kids, your ex’s commitment issues or your eggs and he will be feigning a migraine before dessert.
ex’s commitment issues or your eggs, and he will be feigning a migraine before dessert.
Cut him some slack if his jokes don’t quite land. A sense of humour is as important to him as it is to you. Nothing screams “She’s not for me” like an attractive woman you hardly know saying, “I don’t get it”, “That’s an old one” or “But why would a horse walk into a bar?”. In other words, this is the one instance where we are giving you permission to fake it a little.
Finally, do not sleep with him. It will guarantee you nothing except being thought of as a girl who’s perfect for a good time but not a long time.