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CLEO (Malaysia) - - YOUR LIFE, YOUR RULES! -

o do you have a pic of him?” I ea­gerly asked my friend Kate, who’d let slip that she’d started shar­ing her bed at night with some­one other than her cat. “Sure,” she replied, hand­ing me her phone. “Isn’t he great?!” And by ‘he’, she meant ‘it’, be­cause in its proud, en­gorged, cropped-in glory was her part­ner’s pe­nis. “Oh wow, it’s … lovely!” I ex­claimed. (Re­ally, how en­thu­si­as­tic should you be about a stranger’s gen­i­tals?) “So how’s it ac­tu­ally go­ing?” I pressed. “Well this is go­ing great, but it’s just sex. There’s not much else to say.” And with that, the con­ver­sa­tion closed. I could now pick Kate’s part­ner’s pe­nis out of a po­lice line-up, how­ever, I knew noth­ing about the emo­tional or prac­ti­cal set-up of their re­la­tion­ship.

In the past, my friend­ship group’s de­fault mode of dis­cussing dates had been TMI, with a side or­der of OMG and some com­pli­men­tary FML thrown in. We poked and prod­ded into each other’s love lives as if we were do­ing a Pap test on each re­la­tion­ship. Stay­ing silent dur­ing our group sex-life au­top­sies meant one of only two things: ei­ther you were sleep­ing with an ex and didn’t want any­one to know or you were in a dry spell and sim­ply weren’t see­ing any­one naked. In the years I’ve spent work­ing on

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